Still standing - but with wobbly knees


Registered User
Sep 19, 2007
Hallo everyone. I read here often but don't always feel able to write. On Christmas Day it will be 4 calendar months since my laddo died and it is a hard, hard journey without him. But I am still standing except I have wobbles at times. Early mornings and evenings are the worst times - and Sundays! I have kept very busy. Because I thought my laddo would eventually have to go into a care home I had saved for that purpose. That no longer being necessary I have spent the lot!! On good things. I have had the whole house re-decorated and re-carpeted and have filled three skips - all my rubbish I hasten to add. Laddo was very neat and tidy. It is me who is the clutter-bug. I am going to my brother's for Christmas along with my little dog and I will have to drive 300+ miles which I have never done before. So lots of first's but I decided that, if I didn't do things outside my comfort zone, my world would get smaller and smaller and I am determined for that not to happen.

Love to you all.

from Sammyb


Account Closed
Nov 23, 2007
Dear Sammyb

I read here often but don't always feel able to write.

I cannot do anymore than send you a big hug, you miss your laddo.
I read your posts, I also cannot always reply. I find it difficult, to find the words.

Bless you.
Barb & Ron XXX

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
Hello Sammy

I`m sure you are doing the right thing, keeping yourself busy, trying to do all things positive.
So far so good and the wobbles sound manageable.
Four months is no time at all.
Take care, and make the best you can of Christmas with your brother.
Drive carefully.
Love xx


Registered User
Mar 7, 2004
Dear Sammy

so good to hear from you.

Life must be very hard as it is still early days since you lost your dear Laddo.

How I admire your courage:
So lots of first's but I decided that, if I didn't do things outside my comfort zone, my world would get smaller and smaller and I am determined for that not to
He would be so proud of you. Christmas will be very different for you, but with your determination I am sure you will find something positive in sharing with your brother and his family.

Sending you love n'hugs.


Registered User
Mar 6, 2007
Wigan, Lancs
Hi Sammy,

Good to hear from you and how you're getting on. You seem to have a very positive attitude.

My dad would always advise his clients who had lost their partner, not to make any major decisions in the first year. Good advice I think.

I have spent the lot!!
Good for you. :)


Registered User
May 19, 2008
Hi Sammy

Hope you enjoy xmas with your brother - it will be different but hopefully some good memories will be there for you as well.

Lots of love


Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
SW Scotland
Good to hear from you, Sammy!:)

I'm glad you're still standing -- and even beginning to spread your wings!:)

Christmas will be bitter-sweet for you, but your laddo will be with you in your heart.



Registered User
Nov 16, 2007
East Midlands
Hello's good to hear from you...

And inspiring to hear your positive attitude....:)

Christmas will be a strange time for you....but laddo will always be with you,and it's good that you're not going be at home on your own.

I have to admire your spirit...:)

Wishing you well....

love gigi xx


Registered User
Feb 17, 2006
Yes it is really lovely to read how you’re coping. Having a positive attitude must be good for you in helping yourself move slowly forward without your laddo.

Must be hard mind you, I only say that from seeing my mother pain of missing my father after he pass away.

Wishing you all the best when you go to your brothers for Christmas xx


Registered User
Sep 27, 2006
Hi Sammy,

God bless your stength of spirit. You are an inspiration. I would advise one more purchase Sammy - a Sat Nav for the car. Since getting mine I have no worries about travelling down from tne North of England to Guildford to visit my son and his family. I drive fearlessly nowadays where I would have never driven before! They really are a boon and I think Help the Aged should get a job lot for us timid 'oldies' drivers.


Margaret W

Registered User
Apr 28, 2007
North Derbyshire
Dear Sammy

So wonderful to read your positive steps forward. I am worried, though, about you driving 300 miles. Can you stop off a travel-lodge for the night, making it 150 miles each day? Some are currently offering rooms for £15 a night. Think about it.

Love and best wishes



Registered User
Aug 31, 2008
It's good that you are doing things outside your comfort zone. Life is for living and its important that we make the most of it.
Have a good Christmas and try to enjoy yourself, although I'm sure it won't be an easy time for you.

300 miles is a long journey so take an overnight break if you can.

Take care