Still smarting at tactless gp practice

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by leslyz, Nov 26, 2019.

  1. leslyz

    leslyz Registered User

    Oct 24, 2015
    195
    I'm sorry you had that experience, so tactless and causing unnecessary distress. Sending my sympathies to you at the loss of your mother
     
  2. leslyz

    leslyz Registered User

    Oct 24, 2015
    195
    #22 leslyz, Dec 2, 2019 at 5:45 PM
    Last edited: Dec 2, 2019 at 6:46 PM
    UPDATE
    Here's an update following my original post last week. Thanks to the encouragement and advice on this forum, I wrote a long email to the Practice Manager. It took a while as I wanted to make the point without being too emotional. Anyway i have just had a call back from the manager apologising profusely. Apparently they usually send out a little booklet with advice and the questions to consider and arrange a mutually convenient time to speak to relatives. . Something clearly went wrong due to staff sickness or something and so that didn't get done. She did agree though that the gp himself should not have kept persisting with the questions after I'd told him it was difficult due to lack of privacy and no warning etc. Anyway it's some sort of resution I guess. I did stress that I was writing in order that they could review their process so it doesn't happen again and in fact she was grateful that I did let her know. It was emotional and caused unnecessary distress but it's been validated so I'm glad I made the effort to contact them rather than just let it niggle at me.

    Thanks everyone for the support and advice. Interestingly I was actually able to discuss it with mum at the weekend and she was clear with her decisions herself. .
     
  3. theunknown

    theunknown Registered User

    Apr 17, 2015
    334
    Thanks to those who've responded to my messages.
     
  4. Dimpsy

    Dimpsy Registered User

    Sep 2, 2019
    558
    Female
    Good on you @leslyz, it isn't pleasant having to complain, especially if you're not a natural complainer, but there are times when a situation arises and it doesn't sit well.
    It is regrettable that you were put in an uncomfortable position, and you did the right thing and surely will have prevented someone else having the same upset as you had.

    You must feel more settled since you have sat and listened to your mum and know her wishes. You have made me realise I should probably have 'the talk' with my mum, but I don't want to.
     
  5. Sirena

    Sirena Registered User

    Feb 27, 2018
    1,861
    Female
    Well done @leslyz - that sounds like a positive result.

    Interesting what you say about discussing it with your mum (and you too Dimpsy). My mother wouldn't have been able to understand these issues for the last couple of years so would not have been able to give a coherent response. Her language and comprehension was affected relatively early.
     
  6. leslyz

    leslyz Registered User

    Oct 24, 2015
    195
    @Dimpsy and @serena
    Thanks guys, yes it was interesting I didn't know how the conversation would go and wasn't looking forward to it. I literally told mum that the doctors had called and been asking me and told her a little of how the call had come about (not in so much detail as here obviously) but it brought the subject into the conversation. She was pretty clear about the dnr status thing. The good thing is then it was all forgotten so not too much distress - for her at least.
     

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