My mum was formally diagnosed with dementia in 2013 but indications were there (my dad told me in 2013) since 2009/2010. She has AZH and vascular dementia. Her long term memory seems good but her short term is bad now, it makes conversation repetitious but I have got used to that. Long term is weakening and experience tells me the symptoms I see are the tip of the iceberg. She has lived near the notting hill carnival for 37 years and the crowds and noise have always been something she tolerates and moans about in the run up. This year she forgot it was happening. My Dad is her main carer, before her diagnosis he was complaining about his memory loss, but for last few years won't discuss it. Generally he seems competent but refuses to discuss anything. Physically they both have a number of challenges but they cope. I have resigned myself to the fact that one day they won't remain independent but till then I try not to dwell on how hard accepting help will be for them. I will be seeing them tomorrow and hope they are ok. They are struggling to keep house clean but dad refuses any offers of help and won't come and stay with us for a holiday. Last time I was there mum got tearful because she can't keep the house clean and toilet smells. I offered to help organise a cleaner (say once a month) which she wants but when she discussed with dad he got angry and started shouting. The shouting is very out of character for him. I think it's stress plus he may have emerging AZH. When I talk to my sister she says they seem happy but I think she is ignoring the reality. I do my best to stick to chit chat as they can't cope emotionally except by living in today only. Not noticing the king has no clothes on seems best policy for now but makes me very sad and I no longer feel close to them as I have to pretend all the time. I would love to give my Dad more support but he is isolating them from the world more all the time. In his mind he is protecting mum. Any suggestions???