I have read through lots of posts, but can't find exactly the help I'm looking for.
My situation is that my mum was diagnosed with dementia 2 years ago. She lives with her husband, my step-father, and my siblings live abroad.
In 2017 they both drew up new wills and Power of Attorney documents, and I was named as her representative should the need arise. Whilst she still lives at home, with him caring for her, he has resented the fact that I registered the PoA - done originally as he wanted to sell her house, renovate his house and live in it.
He is threatening and abusive when I visit, and only doesn't shout at me when I take my daughter with me. I have resorted to recording my visits on my phone as I genuinely don't know what he may do as he seems totally irrational in behaviour, despite many many attempts to explain why I registered the PoA.
Mum's mental capacity has obviously declined greatly over this time, and whilst she seems physically well, would be very vulnerable if left alone for any length of time.
Up till now, I have not interfered with her finances, although I do have concerns about the set up. I called into her bank last week to see what the procedure would be to establish control of her account, and although I only asked for advice, they have frozen her account stating that they have to follow protocol.
So now I have a furious step-father who insists he can manage my mums affairs, she's cross too as she only is fuelled by his conversations. He will not recognise that I was nominated her representative, and now I feel the few fractious visits I had, will be more scarce and fraught with tension. I have called with the police to see what steps I can take to see my mum in safety, but I'm not keen on pursuing a Safety Order as I don't want to to make things even worse (his adult children are very much in his side).
What a mess, mum is 80 and I only want to try to make the most of her remaining years.
My situation is that my mum was diagnosed with dementia 2 years ago. She lives with her husband, my step-father, and my siblings live abroad.
In 2017 they both drew up new wills and Power of Attorney documents, and I was named as her representative should the need arise. Whilst she still lives at home, with him caring for her, he has resented the fact that I registered the PoA - done originally as he wanted to sell her house, renovate his house and live in it.
He is threatening and abusive when I visit, and only doesn't shout at me when I take my daughter with me. I have resorted to recording my visits on my phone as I genuinely don't know what he may do as he seems totally irrational in behaviour, despite many many attempts to explain why I registered the PoA.
Mum's mental capacity has obviously declined greatly over this time, and whilst she seems physically well, would be very vulnerable if left alone for any length of time.
Up till now, I have not interfered with her finances, although I do have concerns about the set up. I called into her bank last week to see what the procedure would be to establish control of her account, and although I only asked for advice, they have frozen her account stating that they have to follow protocol.
So now I have a furious step-father who insists he can manage my mums affairs, she's cross too as she only is fuelled by his conversations. He will not recognise that I was nominated her representative, and now I feel the few fractious visits I had, will be more scarce and fraught with tension. I have called with the police to see what steps I can take to see my mum in safety, but I'm not keen on pursuing a Safety Order as I don't want to to make things even worse (his adult children are very much in his side).
What a mess, mum is 80 and I only want to try to make the most of her remaining years.