1. Expert Q&A: Benefits - Weds 23 October, 3-4pm

    Our next expert Q&A will be on the topic of benefits. It will be hosted by Lauren from our Knowledge Services team. She'll be answering your questions on Wednesday 23 October between 3-4pm.

    You can either post your question >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.

  1. wendy43uk

    wendy43uk Registered User

    Dec 22, 2005
    64
    sheffield
    how do i no wich stage johns tablets he takes seem to have stopped workng he takes ebixa twice a day arecept 10milgram at bedtime he seems to have slowed down alot this last 3 weeks hes only 60 he was dinosed 19 feb 2oo4 but was not his self from june 2002 whats next anybody can advice me i feel so alone:mad:
     
  2. Amy

    Amy Registered User

    Jan 4, 2006
    3,453
    Hiya Wendy,
    Sounds as though you need to visit the doctor, to see if the medication needs adjusting. I would jot down a few notes about how John has altered lately. The weather has been very warm recently, has John been drinking plenty of water?

    There is a help sheet called Progression of Dementia, that gives a brief outline of the various stages. Top left corner of the page is an i Factsheets, click on that.

    Wendy if you feel able to tell us a little more about how John is, then maybe we can help you with what to expect. You are not alone now, you have many friends on here who will support you through this. Remember, though John is changing, there are still good times to be had.
    Take care.
    Love Helen.
     
  3. wendy43uk

    wendy43uk Registered User

    Dec 22, 2005
    64
    sheffield
    hi thanks for that could well be he needs to drink some juice will try it when i say hes slowed down i mean he walkes slower drinks and eats slower has problebs getting washed dressed and fogeting a lot his memory seems a lot worse hes very quite he seems to just sit unless i tell him to move a bit he allways loved the sunshine now for the first time in 15 years hes whight i feel he prefers me to be at work as i talk to him and get him doing things he sleeps 13 hrs a night and when i am at work he goes to bed for 3 or 4 hrs in the afternoon he seems to have lost his smile never loooks at the paper even waches cartoons if thire on to save turning the tv over mabe this helps up to 3 weeks ago he seemed to be much better mabe its the heat i hope so
     
  4. wendy43uk

    wendy43uk Registered User

    Dec 22, 2005
    64
    sheffield
    stages how do u monter them

    hi dose any one know what a stage is i cant follow is thire 7 stages or 3 :rolleyes:
     
  5. daughter

    daughter Registered User

    Mar 16, 2005
    824
    Hi Wendy,

    Bruce set up a poll last year:

    http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/TalkingPoint/Discuss/showthread.php?t=1854&highlight=stages

    Bruce also mentioned a link that may help:
    Please remember though that everyone is different. I hope you and John are staying cool in this weather, best wishes,
     
  6. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    #6 Margarita, Jul 27, 2006
    Last edited: Jul 27, 2006
    My mother is taking takes ebixa twice a day and is sleeping a lot lately , if it was not for the AZ day centre mum would sleep more , I also don’t know if its because the medication slowly not working or is it the heat , but I feel the heat has a lot to do with it .

    I look back to last year when mum was in Gibraltar for 4 weeks and remember she did sleep a lot as it was very hot, but not as much as now that could be because we are not near the sea and live in London so its extra hot with all the pollution she also urinating her self at home, but not at day centre.

    But when she gets back from day centre is extra tired and that when she forget to go to the toilet or when I remind her she wets herself before she get there .


    Dose your husband go to any day centre ?



    I find it hard to work out the stages as mum has good days and bad days & as the medication is meant to slow it down am confused where she is. I try to work it out in what mum remembers from the past as to work out where she is with the AD .

    PS

    On a good day mum will be in the time she remember she was married to dad

    Bad day she in 1936 before she married dad, and can’t remember any of my childhood but then in all this she still know me and my brother her grandchildren and that dad is dead

    She is not a text book of AD
     
  7. wendy43uk

    wendy43uk Registered User

    Dec 22, 2005
    64
    sheffield
    hi john goes to day centure five days a week he sounds much like your mum but is still dry and clean i looked at the link for stages i think john is late 4 or maybe 5 like uou its hard to tell john has good days and bad and even terrbble days when he seems trance like mabe foggy thats what he says how long as youre mum been taking ebixa when john first went on it he was much inproved that seemed to last 5 months somdays john has insite when i get to see the man i married not so ofton thease days but last week was the first one in 10 weeks when i say to him its nice to see uou he laughs and tells me about a fog that the cant get away from much he noes he is ill and has ad wich is so sad but he also says hes not botherd about it how long as mum been ill
     
  8. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    #8 Margarita, Jul 31, 2006
    Last edited: Aug 1, 2006
    I also had a look at that link I would say my mother is at stage 5 , I am sorry to say that I said to my mother on Saturday that she is going to get worse , she look at me and said are you stupid? You really are stupid you are stupid. I did not take affiance (sp) just felt sad & I know I should never of said it & it was soon forgotten anyway after a few moment , your husband sounds like he has some insight in what is happening to him when he says about the fog .

    My mum been on the medication for 3 years now My mother is a strong welled woman I can see she fighting it. Since I have been playing her Spanish music over the weekend she picking up & has not wet herself. but I know going to day centre really tries her out , but she does look forward to it ,she was talking to my daughter about it today & my daughter said your really look forward to going to daycentre?

    My mother could not understand what looking forward meant in Spanish or English I am finding she is losing the understanding in what said to her.

    Ps

    When you say you see the man you married before , that’s what happen to me it was like my mother was back on Saturday . so I wanted to tell her that she was going to get worse , but then who wants to hear that ? I read that they lose that part of how another person is feeling she never see my point .you know what I have learn in all this hell of AD is just enjoy the moments when they come back and then disrepair , because those moments are surly rear .

    There never going to come back for long even with the medication I have tormented myself so much in the past wanting my mum back that I can not do it no more ,so I do feel for you its like we our in a living grief , grieving for the lost past while they are living in fount of us .
     
  9. Lila13

    Lila13 Registered User

    Feb 24, 2006
    1,342
    My mother was about Stage 3. She knew it was going to get worse. I tried to encourage her to look forward to the good bits. But, no use.

    Lila
     
  10. wendy43uk

    wendy43uk Registered User

    Dec 22, 2005
    64
    sheffield
    hi all last night we went to my sons engagment party when a friend walked in johns face was evel iasked what was wrong he refered to the man as my lover my son took him home what next i need some help as if he goes down this path he will go in care cant cope wendy
     
  11. connie

    connie Registered User

    Mar 7, 2004
    9,519
    Frinton-on-Sea
    Hello Wendy, feel for you at this time.

    I have been where you are with your husband, and it is never nice to be accused of anything, BUT HE CANNOT HELP IT. It is the illness playing with his mind.

    Lionel has accused me of going out at night looking for other men, spending his money on them, shoplifting......you name it, he says I have done it.

    However lately things seem to have quitened down, had his anti psycotic drug dosage adjusted (until the next outburst).

    Wendy dear, as hard as it may seem, they are only words. Take care, and come and rant here any time.
     
  12. wendy43uk

    wendy43uk Registered User

    Dec 22, 2005
    64
    sheffield
    hi connie thanks for that it is hard very its the illness not poor john when it happenes its so upsetting mabe when he goes to see his head doctor i cant spell the other name for him i will tell him mabe they will change his meds wendy
     
  13. connie

    connie Registered User

    Mar 7, 2004
    9,519
    Frinton-on-Sea
    Wendy,

    I have always found it just pays to "tell it like it is" when you go to see the doctor/consultant/neuropsycologist/CPN/ ...really anyone.

    Write it down in note form before hand if that helps. If we do not tell them, they cannot help.

    When you are trying to cope, every day, with accusations, innuendos, downright lies, it is soooooo wearing, BUT, we have to ask for help to put it right.

    I have NEVER ever been in favour of over medication, BUT I know I would not be able to cope if Lionel's irrational fears and delusions were not kept under control.

    Take care sweetheart, let us know how you get on.
     
  14. wendy43uk

    wendy43uk Registered User

    Dec 22, 2005
    64
    sheffield
    hi

    went to see the doctor at the hosptal johns minimental has reaced 11 6 months ago it was 19his meds are not working the doctor says nothing they can do i feel so down
     
  15. dmc

    dmc Registered User

    Mar 13, 2006
    1,157
    #15 dmc, Aug 24, 2006
    Last edited: Feb 1, 2007
    hi wendy,

    sorry to hear your feeling low, just thought i'd send a hug to let you know your not alone x
     
  16. May

    May Registered User

    Oct 15, 2005
    627
    Yorkshire
    Sending Big hugs from me too Wendy
    Take care
     
  17. wendy43uk

    wendy43uk Registered User

    Dec 22, 2005
    64
    sheffield
    hi had a rotton day today today went to work was thire 2mins i had to come home as i was so low been crying most off the day not the answer what is the answer
     
  18. Amy

    Amy Registered User

    Jan 4, 2006
    3,453
    Wendy love,
    You are having to get your head round things - you feel that you are getting to the point where you and the kids can nolonger care for your husband at home. That is a really tough place to be. You know that you have to do all that you can to keep your husband safe, as he cannot do it for himself. It doesn't mean that you like the decision that you feel that you have to make. You are grieving for what you feel that you are having to let go of - your life lived together. That is perfectly natural. So don't be hard on yourself Wendy. Cry all you need to. And hopefully tomorrow you will feel a little stronger.
    Take care.
    Love Helen
     

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