1. frederickgt

    frederickgt Registered User

    Jun 4, 2005
    124
    Hornchurch,Essex
    [SIZ[/SIZE]
    Today March 14th is St,Patricks day,exactly two months since my wide died in Hospital,I sit looking at a photograph of her,my Anna,"Wearing the Green".I miss her so much,I am lonely,all my friends visit the first few days,but now it has dried up.
    Except for my dog Basil.I have no company,Bassil keeps me alive,without me,who would take care od himm.
    This is a cruel world,I will be glad to be out of it,there is nothing for me here now.
    I am glad that Anna has gone,because she is no longer confused or suffering,
    Why did she have to suffer?there are many more wicked people in the world,why Anna?
    I will be glad to leave this world,I hope I can find Anna.
    Thank you for listening,Thanks to T.P say a prayer for me.
     
  2. Kate P

    Kate P Registered User

    Jul 6, 2007
    565
    Merseyside
    Hi Frederick

    I'm so sorry you're feeling so sad - how can you not now that your Anna has gone. But as you say she is at peace now - no longer confused but whole again.

    I wish I could say something wonderfully inspired to help you during this said time where you adjust to a new chapter of your life.

    I'm glad you have your dog Basil to be company for you and your reason to keep going just now until you find new purpose to your life.

    My dog who died last week was called Basil - a lovely Jack Russell and he was wonderful company and affection for me.

    I'm praying hard for you and I sincerely hope you continue to come here to TP where I'm sure others can emphasise with your situation and help you to get through this time.

    Please take care of yourself Frederick and don't be afraid to ask your friends and family for company - they are probably staying away just now in case you wish to grieve privately.
     
  3. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,661
    Kent
    Hello Frederick.

    It is only two months since you lost Anna, two short months after years and years of being together and sharing your lives.

    I`m so sorry you are finding life so hard without her, but how could it be any other way?

    There are very few couples who die together. The ones who die in accidents are the only ones I can think of. One is always left behind. That one has to grieve and in the grief try to make some form or life for themselves, by themselves.

    I have no answers. I don`t know how it`s done. But I do see people who are widowed, both men and women, struggling on by themselves.

    I`m sure it takes them a very long time. I know it will take you a very long time. Loneliness without your life long partner is not a good feeling. I wish I could help you.

    Love xx

    Love xx
     
  4. Brucie

    Brucie Registered User

    Jan 31, 2004
    12,413
    near London
    Hello Frederick

    Yours is a stage I haven't stepped upon yet, as my Jan is still here, so I can only talk in terms of my Mum and Grandma, who are no longer here, physically.

    When we are so close to somebody for so many years, we become part of them, and they also become part of us.

    That is why it is so hard when we lose them; part of us goes missing for a while.

    The way I handle it is to work on the grounds that, when they were still here, but I was not physically with them, they were still with me in my heart, mind and imagination. Now they are not here, and I can't be physically with them again, they are still here with me.

    It is the same so far, to some extent, with my Jan. I visit her but it is not my Jan of old in many ways, yet.... I know she is still there. While I am away from her she is there as the person she was, and as she is now. It is only when the two meet in my mind that it is most difficult. If I take them individually, I can manage.

    I celebrate Jan's life every day, so she is with me then. Everywhere I go, there is a memory of some sort, so Jan is still with me all the time.

    It's like we are just separated for a while, and Jan would not want me to be unhappy all the time.

    We can't avoid those crushing moments though, and I hope you can find some way to manage.

    best wishes
     
  5. Taffy

    Taffy Registered User

    Apr 15, 2007
    1,314
    Dear Frederick,

    Understandably your so very sad and lonely grieving for your Anna.

    Life is cruel and there is so much suffering, wickedness does exist but so does kindness. Kate is so right....many people just don't know what to say. I think it is out of fear of upsetting you. Reach out to your friends talk to them....true friends will be there for you.

    Maybe, Frederick you could make contact with a Bereavement Support Service there you will identify with people that truly understand your feelings.

    Pets are so loyal, great company and comfort....Basil is lucky to have you....as you are to have him.

    I know your facing very difficult times try to focus on the happy memories Anna left behind and draw peace from the knowledge that Anna is free now from all her fear and suffering.

    Frederick, you will be reunited with Anna again....in Gods time.

    I'll say a prayer for you and Anna.

    God Bless, stay strong....Love Taffy.
     

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