social services assessment

[susiewoo]

Hello everybody. I am new to posting but have visited this site so many times I feel as if I am among friends.
My Mum was diagnosed in 2000 and we have jogged along with the memory drugs and the two days a week at the day centre. She lives with my Dad who is totally useless..I suppose he is as lost as I am on how to deal with things but he has blocked so many plans it's just amazing!
Mum has recently got alot worse..very confused and agitated/not recognising her own home..in fact just reading thru the posts I can see her in everything. She has also just started another day at a different day centre which is so different and seems to be giving her what she needs...fun,laughter,singing etc.
She is finally having a formal assessment by social services next week. Can anyone give me some advice about this process?
What should I do to get the best out of this?
What can we expect from this assessment?
All help gratefully accepted. Thankyou.

 

[Lila13]

Glad the day centre is helping.

Tell the social worker about the worst times.

If necessary write a few notes for the social worker beforehand.

Good luck ...

Lila

 

[Norman]

Hi Susiewoo
welcome to Talking Point.
You do not say if you live with Mum and Dad?
The assessment is to deternine your needs both the sufferer and the carer.
Personal care for Mum AM AND PM,washing bathing,dressing.
Time out for the carer to follow their own pursuits.
Any aids,hand rails etc.
You can also ask about direct payments which is money paid by SS which you use to buy in care,have a read up on it,at,

http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/After_diagnosis/Sorting_out_your_money/info_directpayments.htm

Hope this helps a little
Norman

 

[susiewoo]

Thanks for that.
I don't live with my parents but am the nearest of 4 children.
My Dad is frailer than Mum and although he is classed as her 'carer' I feel that I am looking after them both. There seems to be a crisis of some kind nearly everyday and I am either sorting it out over the phone or going round. I work full time and have my own family etc and sometimes feel swamped by it all.
I am the one who has organised everything from day care to nomad boxes..taking them to hospital appointments..fetching my Mum to sleep over with us when she phones crying and not knowing where she is. My Dads response is to take to his bed and ignore her. She has left the house on her own and nearly was run down. I feel that I am waiting for a tragedy before my Dad wakes up to his responsibilities. All he can say is she must be 'put away'. With a loving partner her life would be so different.

 

[noelphobic]

Thanks for that.
I don't live with my parents but am the nearest of 4 children.
My Dad is frailer than Mum and although he is classed as her 'carer' I feel that I am looking after them both. There seems to be a crisis of some kind nearly everyday and I am either sorting it out over the phone or going round. I work full time and have my own family etc and sometimes feel swamped by it all.
I am the one who has organised everything from day care to nomad boxes..taking them to hospital appointments..fetching my Mum to sleep over with us when she phones crying and not knowing where she is. My Dads response is to take to his bed and ignore her. She has left the house on her own and nearly was run down. I feel that I am waiting for a tragedy before my Dad wakes up to his responsibilities. All he can say is she must be 'put away'. With a loving partner her life would be so different.

I can relate so much to what you say here! My dad died nearly 2 years ago but prior to that their situation sounds very similar! My mum wanted my dad to go in a home and my dad wanted my mum to go in a home! Neither of them wanted to go in a home themselves!

My dad would talk about everything that he did for my mum but in reality it was very little. He was also very impatient and short tempered with her which just made her confusion worse.

We were lucky in that my mum never actually 'wandered' and I am sure that causes tremendous stress and worry.

I hope the assessment helps and that something is put in place to make the situation easier to cope with.

I am very curious as to what a 'nomad box' is?

 

[carol]

Hi,

My mother in laws 'nomad box' is like a flat plastic tray with dimples in where the whole weeks/months pills are dispensed into the sealed dimples, it has days of the week across the top, and down the side it has morn. noon. eve. night. I don't know if they are all the same, but my mother in laws is dispensed by Lloyds pharmacy, the carers we use will only give medication if it is like this. Also it is much easier when someone goes into hospital because all the medication is together, and the tray can just be handed over.

Carol

 

[noelphobic]

Hi,

My mother in laws 'nomad box' is like a flat plastic tray with dimples in where the whole weeks/months pills are dispensed into the sealed dimples, it has days of the week across the top, and down the side it has morn. noon. eve. night. I don't know if they are all the same, but my mother in laws is dispensed by Lloyds pharmacy, the carers we use will only give medication if it is like this. Also it is much easier when someone goes into hospital because all the medication is together, and the tray can just be handed over.

Carol

ah, now I understand

My mum used to have one but I had never heard it referred to as a nomad box before. I wonder where that phrase came from - isn't a nomad someone who travels a lot and has no home

I also thought that hospital staff would only give out their own medication, not drugs brought in from outside.

 

[carol]

Hi,

The hospital use the nomad for reference purposes, to identify the persons medication, we had to hand all medications (nomad box) over to the paramedics, the hospital then dispensed the same medication from their own pharmacy, the nomad box was returned on discharge.

Carol

 

[connie]

Whenever Lionel goes into respite I have to organise all medications for him in advance. Hospitals, of course, may operate on a different basis.

 

[Áine]

My mum used to have one but I had never heard it referred to as a nomad box before. I wonder where that phrase came from - isn't a nomad someone who travels a lot and has no home

Yeah, I was quite intruiged as to where the idea of "nomad" came from. It kind of conjured up images of trekking across deserts ............ which was the last thing I wanted to imagine dad doing ( ............ well .............. OK ............ not exactly the LAST thing .......... but ......................... )

 

[carol]

Hi Connie,

It's so easy with a 'nomad box' pre filled in sealed compartments, when my mother in law goes into respite we just hand the box over. Also I stated in a previous post that the hospital keeps the nomad box (in our case) in the locked bedside locker, and dispenses the prescribed pills from their own pharmacy - via the pill trolley - except last night when we were visiting m in law, they went to the bedside locker, unlocked it and took her Ebixa out of her own nomad box!!

Mother in law is currently in hospital for the 2nd time in 3 weeks, with l day at home. She was originally admitted with chest/urine infection for 1 week, was discharged - l day - then was very poorly, asleep, hallucinations chronic diarrhoea, was readmitted and had clostridium difficle (hospital superbug) very poorly for a few days, but now 2 weeks on much improved, although the last couple of days appears very tired, my father in law aged 86 has been her main carer, with family help, and an outside carer agency coming in 3 times a day, but the hospital have convinced him that she requires full time care, and she is now classed as an unsafe discharge, and after all the necessary assessments have been carried out and when she is well enough, she will be discharged directly into a care home.

We are all sorry about this, but realise it is for the best, because in our opinion she has required 24 hr care probably for the past couple of years.

Best wishes.

Carol

 

[susiewoo]

We had this assessment yesterday and the outcome is my Mum although has many needs none are bad enough to qualify for help from ss. They suggested a carers organisation and are sending details.
At least a basic assessment has been done and when we all meet again they will have something to refer to I suppose.

 

[Nell]

Thanks for that.
I don't live with my parents but am the nearest of 4 children.
My Dad is frailer than Mum and although he is classed as her 'carer' I feel that I am looking after them both. There seems to be a crisis of some kind nearly everyday and I am either sorting it out over the phone or going round. I work full time and have my own family etc and sometimes feel swamped by it all.
I am the one who has organised everything from day care to nomad boxes..taking them to hospital appointments..fetching my Mum to sleep over with us when she phones crying and not knowing where she is. My Dads response is to take to his bed and ignore her. She has left the house on her own and nearly was run down. I feel that I am waiting for a tragedy before my Dad wakes up to his responsibilities. All he can say is she must be 'put away'. With a loving partner her life would be so different.

Hi Susiewoo,
For whatever reasons your Dad is not coping. It sounds like it is pretty rapidly getting to the stage where you will find it too difficult also - I salute you for manaing sowell up to now! Perhaps you could consider a home for both of them? My parents went into a home togethjer and it worked well. I know every circumstance is different and maybe this wouldn't suit your family, but perhaps it is something to consider. Best wishes, Nell