So what happens next..feeling out of control of the situation

snowygirl

Registered User
Jan 9, 2014
151
0
So mum has now been in hospital for 4 weeks following her kidney failure when we thought for two days we were going to lose her. Life since has been a continuing nightmare. They've stabilised her kidneys and heart(she has heart failure too) but she is still retaining much more fluid than before in her stomach so her mobility is worse and so too is her dementia. She's been off her Menantane for the past 4 weeks as apparently its bad for her kidneys. I've been driving the 1.5 hrs every 2-3 days now to see her back and forth as so too have my siblings and I've been told that mum has been referred to SS for an assessment to determine what happens next but this has already taken 10 days. My question is if the family agree(as we do)that mum now needs to go into a care home and she's self funding why do we have to wait for this assessment?
We don't really want mum to be moved into an assessment bed as this happened to my dad and he was there for 6 weeks. Mum will have been in hospital, then the assessment centre wherever that is and then she will have to be moved to the final care home. All we want to know is whether she needs nursing care or not as this will determine whether we can move her in with dad to a care home as opposed to a nursing home. Can the hospital not tell us that? I suppose I'm asking 'can we cut out the middle man?' and just get on with things. I've been told that she could be moved even further away from her family than she is now if she's assessed. Does she have to be formerly assessed in this way? Thanks for reading!
 

Red66

Registered User
Feb 29, 2016
362
0
Hi, I don't have experience of this exactly, but given the fact your mum has both heart and kidney failure I would have thought nursing as an oppose to care. Sorry if I am wrong!! Good luck. Red x
 

Hill Man

Registered User
Apr 10, 2016
61
0
Mid Wales
The issue here is that folk with a dementia have an absolute right to a care needs assessment by the council - even if ultimately they receive no funding as a result. Consequently SS feel they "have" to do an assessment whatever the family might say. Speak with the staff about whether they feel your mums needs will be predominantly nursing in the future.
I often find the main difficulty is that organisations like to do things sequentially - SS assessment followed by continuing health care assessment and are virtually hardwired to follow a predetermined path
 

fizzie

Registered User
Jul 20, 2011
2,725
0
If I were you I would speak to your Dad's care home, tell them that is where you want her to be and usually they will come and do an assessment - and if they agree to take her ...and as you are self funding I can't see why there would need to be any delays at all. That is the way round I would tackle it but others will have more direct experience
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
25,018
0
South coast
When mum was in hospital before she went into her CH there had to be a Best Interest Meeting to determine that she was going to be discharged to a suitable place. This was done even though she would be self-funding. The BI Meeting was attended by one of the doctors, the Social Worker, the CH manager, mum (she was still mobile then) and me. It was a unanimous decision for her to go to the CH.
 

bumblefeet

Registered User
Oct 25, 2016
99
0
My mum is currently in rehab care, after a hip replacement, and we are due to have a BI meeting. I'm looking at her moving to a care home until her dementia settles, and we can see how she would be going back home. I don't think she's suitable to go home, she would have no quality of life, she wouldn't clean herself (never mind the house), barely cook etc.
This is all new to me, but, I'm finding it very hard, as I didn't expect to actually have a meeting to allow my own mother to leave rehab care, particularly as we will be self funded. Naïve, I suppose.

We have to do a home visit, myself and the OT, even though it seems that she's moving towards mid stage dementia, and already isn't coping at home. I'm reconciling myself to the fact that it's just a hoop to jump through.

I'm not sure re your mum, surely she can be assessed in hospital? I'm mentioning 'mental health' a lot, and keeping a diary. Could you state the case of keeping her in hospital whilst the assessment is done, for fear of distressing her?

I'm new to all this, but surely this would be better for all?
 

Pickles53

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
2,474
0
Radcliffe on Trent
It must vary from place to place. My mum was taken to A&E after a fall, not admitted but after assessment sent to a local care home for one week by 'rapid response team' to see if she could get mobility back with physio support. Her CPN and OT visited her there. We brought forward our plans to move her to a care home near us, but nobody ever questioned the decisions or asked us to attend any meetings. I assumed that was because she was self-funding. TBH, as up to that point SS had shown zero interest in helping us organise care for her despite none of us living within 60 miles, I would have resented them trying to dictate any future course of action.