So, what’s my Pauline been up to today?

Moggymad

Registered User
May 12, 2017
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one occasion, in a tower block i used to live in, some lads got a bit too drunk and one push another down the lift shaft as it was being repaired and left with a barrier around it. it was a good place for school pupils to skive as well.
Crikey! He may not have felt it too much though with all the alcohol on board?
The time the lift was out of order for 6 months the local nuisance had set fire to something in the lift & sent it to the top floor. Luckily the fire was contained but the lift was gutted. They targeted mums block until housing association took over & put in cctv & generally tightened up on security. This was in process when mum moved into care. It was just too unsafe for her especially as she was calling out to random people outside that she wanted to go home. Luckily one of the ‘randoms’ turned out to be a good guy who went up to mum & saw my telephone number next to her phone & rang me.
 

Agzy

Registered User
Nov 16, 2016
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Moreton, Wirral. UK.
Thankfully the block we may be moving too has great security and 1st class maintainance being sheltered Housing. I know we do need to move to a more suitable home but I know that the likelihood of persuading her to come walking with me is slim given stepping out of the front door is only the first step to fresh air whereas here it is the only step. We will also miss our neighbours who are wonderful and of course the discount retailer opposite (our version of a corner shop).
 

Agzy

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Nov 16, 2016
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Moreton, Wirral. UK.
Not sure if it is related but since getting the phone call about the flat but it has taken some persuading to get her to come walking and this morning, being Tuesday, it is TV magazine day and usually she cant wait to get her coat on and head out with the coins clasped in her hand to the corner shop. In spite of bright sunshine and the 72p on the window sill this morning she insisted I go for it and since I brought it back she has hardly looked at it and has just sat stirring out of the window watching the traffic and children heading out to schools. Not a normal Tuesday that is certain.
 

Agzy

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Nov 16, 2016
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Moreton, Wirral. UK.
Update on yesterday as, against all the odds I managed to persuade Pauline to accompany me to a DementiaTogether afternoon get together and sing a long and it went brilliantly! Lots of complains while driving there and usual complaint when see cared for and carers, “they are all old.” I have ignored the swear words! Anyway we had a wonderful welcome and her insistence on seeing them make her cup of tea using her own teabag was taken as though everyone did it plus they had her favourite chocolate covered biscuit. The young girl singer who entertained us was lovely and had a great voice and of course sang songs we could join in with and Pauline went for it with a big smile ?. She then won a glass teapot in the free raffle and gave it all ten out of ten as we left. Wonderful and uplifting but brought down to earth today by yet another water infection ?. Sample now at GPs and waiting for phone call, ah well.
 

Agzy

Registered User
Nov 16, 2016
3,777
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Moreton, Wirral. UK.
After dropping off water sample at surgery we got a nurse call back within the hour and she said it was a bad one and immediately authorised antibiotics and to be honest the change in just 24 hours is amazing and we even had a bit of a stroll round the block. Not very communicative since walk and yawning a lot but getting better which is the main thing. Bit of a worry is that I am due to go to the NEC at Birmingham tomorrow for the Motability show as supply issues mean ordering next one early and this is best way to see all choices in one spot so just hope improvement continues.
 

Agzy

Registered User
Nov 16, 2016
3,777
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Moreton, Wirral. UK.
As our Motability car is due for replacement early 2023 and the issues with supply lines I was advised to make my choice as early as possible so to be ready for ordering in November and so went to the NEC Motability show yesterday. Spoke to Pauline lots about it and put information on white boards but when it came time to leave she was horrible and just cold shouldered me and so I spent the whole 120 mile journey feeling worried and so very guilty and made worse when she didn’t answer the phone when I called. In spite of that I am so glad I went as now have a short list of vehicles to follow up through dealerships and, and this will be the hard bit, take Pauline with me to make sure the final choice is right for her too.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
23,135
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Southampton
As our Motability car is due for replacement early 2023 and the issues with supply lines I was advised to make my choice as early as possible so to be ready for ordering in November and so went to the NEC Motability show yesterday. Spoke to Pauline lots about it and put information on white boards but when it came time to leave she was horrible and just cold shouldered me and so I spent the whole 120 mile journey feeling worried and so very guilty and made worse when she didn’t answer the phone when I called. In spite of that I am so glad I went as now have a short list of vehicles to follow up through dealerships and, and this will be the hard bit, take Pauline with me to make sure the final choice is right for her too.
dont forget the colour is important too @Agzy
















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Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
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Nottinghamshire
The colour of the car is always the first thing I ask when my husband choses a new car! It sounds a good idea to do that @Agzy, and I'm sure Pauline will be fine about it in the end.
I hope the antibiotics have picked in and Pauline is starting to feel better.
Have you made any decisions about moving yet?
 

Agzy

Registered User
Nov 16, 2016
3,777
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Moreton, Wirral. UK.
The colour of the car is always the first thing I ask when my husband choses a new car! It sounds a good idea to do that @Agzy, and I'm sure Pauline will be fine about it in the end.
I hope the antibiotics have picked in and Pauline is starting to feel better.
Have you made any decisions about moving yet?
Thank you @Sarasa, I think it i my turn to select colour but as usual will select the colour Pauline tells me too ?. We know a flat is coming available soon but waiting until it is ready (usually as resident has either died or gone into a home) and we will be offered it sometime soon. Both of us have misgivings about the actual move but common sense dictates we should accept so fingers crossed.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
23,135
0
Southampton
Thank you @Sarasa, I think it i my turn to select colour but as usual will select the colour Pauline tells me too ?. We know a flat is coming available soon but waiting until it is ready (usually as resident has either died or gone into a home) and we will be offered it sometime soon. Both of us have misgivings about the actual move but common sense dictates we should accept so fingers crossed.
i think is a lady thing about colour of car as longs pauline doesnt choose pink, you will be ok
 

jugglingmum

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Jan 5, 2014
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Chester
On the few times we've bought brand new cars we needed a new car in a hurry so took what was available at the dealers. We

I think for our first campervan we had to order the vehicle so we chose the colour.

I'm sorry you've both got misgivings about moving - there will be things you'll miss about where you are now but hopefully on balance it'll be the right thing. And whilst it's hard to plan ahead having a flat all on one level should make life easier.
 

Agzy

Registered User
Nov 16, 2016
3,777
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Moreton, Wirral. UK.
On the few times we've bought brand new cars we needed a new car in a hurry so took what was available at the dealers. We

I think for our first campervan we had to order the vehicle so we chose the colour.

I'm sorry you've both got misgivings about moving - there will be things you'll miss about where you are now but hopefully on balance it'll be the right thing. And whilst it's hard to plan ahead having a flat all on one level should make life easier.
Do agree @jugglingmum but my worries for Pauline is finding/remembering her way through security (a fob), which lift and then which flat as all look identical exiting the lift. This will almost certainly take away her solo walks and shopping and so some independence but once indoors yes, a lot easier.
 

jugglingmum

Registered User
Jan 5, 2014
7,085
0
Chester
My mum had a key fob when she moved to her (sheltered extra care ) flat and learnt to use to use it.

When she moved in she got lost in her small flat and would tell me that she had a kitchen but didn't know where it was in her small hall. 2 steps into lounge and she could see kitchen. 2 weeks later she was amazed how difficult she'd found it to know where kitchen was.

For the first 6 weeks or so someone helped her to leave her flat use the lift and get to the restaurant. After that she could do it on her own until she couldn't remember the time to go but even then she was only prompted to leave flat and got there on her own.

So with support Pauline might manage to cope on her own.

And the views will be lovely
 

Shedrech

Registered User
Dec 15, 2012
12,649
0
UK
hi @Agzy
might you ask the manager of the complex whether it's OK to put a sign/picture of some kind on the outside of your door to distinguish it for Pauline ... not a name plaque but maybe an image that Pauline associates with herself and you eg a favourite picture/bird/ animal

a bit trickier about the lift ... maybe suggest to the manager eg a colour code for each lift ... I suspect there'll be other residents who'd be glad of this

maybe what jugglingmum describes may be helpful ie doing the route several times to get it into 'muscle memory', pointing out the same features/moves each time eg middle lift, 3rd button, turn left, pass window, second door ... though it's a lot to take in
 

Jaded'n'faded

Registered User
Jan 23, 2019
5,259
0
High Peak
I'd suggest a sign that sticks out as well as the picture on the door. Mum had similar problems in the care home. Fortunately there was only one lift and it only went from the ground floor to the first floor but when she got out, she didn't know whether to turn left or right, seeing only 2 corridors with identical doors. I did the journey several times with her and would say 'Right or left?' when we got out of the lift. She'd guess but I would drop loud hints - 'Which is the RIGHT way to go?' and 'Right you are!' and 'You're always right!' etc. which made her giggle. She soon learned that but was still faced with a row of identical doors. What helped was me sticking a sign up (a piece of card with her name on!) that stuck out at right angles from her door, like a small flag. When she looked down the corridor, it was the only thing sticking out so she would see it straightaway.

Hope this - or something similar - works for Pauline.
 

Agzy

Registered User
Nov 16, 2016
3,777
0
Moreton, Wirral. UK.
I'd suggest a sign that sticks out as well as the picture on the door. Mum had similar problems in the care home. Fortunately there was only one lift and it only went from the ground floor to the first floor but when she got out, she didn't know whether to turn left or right, seeing only 2 corridors with identical doors. I did the journey several times with her and would say 'Right or left?' when we got out of the lift. She'd guess but I would drop loud hints - 'Which is the RIGHT way to go?' and 'Right you are!' and 'You're always right!' etc. which made her giggle. She soon learned that but was still faced with a row of identical doors. What helped was me sticking a sign up (a piece of card with her name on!) that stuck out at right angles from her door, like a small flag. When she looked down the corridor, it was the only thing sticking out so she would see it straightaway.

Hope this - or something similar - works for Pauline.
??
 

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