My husband can be alert and able to make decisions one minute and confused and talking crazy the next. We are in a bad stage right now. When he is confused he states that he isn't and gets mad. The doctor diagnosed him with Dementia and put him on Aricpet, Senemet and Exelon. He went to a follow up a few months back and the doctor said that he was so alert and doing so well that he did not think that he had dementia (hello....isn't the meds supposed to help the decrease the symptoms). So I get upset and leave and go to the car and husband comes down later and tells me that the doctor says he can stop the meds. He stops the Exelon and actually was doing okay off of it, but still taking Aricept 10mg. I reduced it to 5mg and he started falling apart, and wants it increased again. So he calls the doctor and has it increased and when we go back in a month he will being doing better because of the increase and then doctor will not see what is really going on. He has my 17 year old daughter in tears all the time, he is angry one minute, happy the next. What do I do in regards to the doctor, husband is lucid enough that he refuses to see another doctor because he likes what this one is saying. He is going around saying that the doctor says he does not have Dementia. I am about to lose it, I do not know how much more I can take of this. Do I take him off all of the meds, without him knowing it and then take him back to the doctor? To me this will show the doctor what we are dealing with. But if I do take him off the meds we can not leave him alone or barely live with him. OMG......this is a nightmare.
So many questions !
- Thread starter SabandMack
- Start date
Hello SabandMack and welcome to Talking Point.
It is very common for people with dementia not to understand that they have dementia - in their eyes they are FINE and there is nothing wrong, so him saying that he doesnt need his meds is par for the course.
Trying to get over to doctors what they are like at home, when they are so lucid at the appointment is also common. I sympathise with the idea of taking him off the meds so that the doctors can see what he is like, but I dont recommend it! Try writing a letter outlining the problems and your concerns and sending it to the doctor (is this the memory clinic doctor?) ahead of the appointment, or give it to the receptionist when you arrive. A tip given to me is to sit slightly behind your husband at the appointment so that you can nod or shake your head at things your husband is saying without him seeing.
If things become difficult you can always contact the memory clinic about the medication
It is very common for people with dementia not to understand that they have dementia - in their eyes they are FINE and there is nothing wrong, so him saying that he doesnt need his meds is par for the course.
Trying to get over to doctors what they are like at home, when they are so lucid at the appointment is also common. I sympathise with the idea of taking him off the meds so that the doctors can see what he is like, but I dont recommend it! Try writing a letter outlining the problems and your concerns and sending it to the doctor (is this the memory clinic doctor?) ahead of the appointment, or give it to the receptionist when you arrive. A tip given to me is to sit slightly behind your husband at the appointment so that you can nod or shake your head at things your husband is saying without him seeing.
If things become difficult you can always contact the memory clinic about the medication
Could your daughter video one of these episodes on her phone so that you could show the doctor what you are up against. I don't mean in his face so that he can see whats going on, but just have it turned on in her hand to record the tension and whats said?
