Just heard from OH - Fifty Six people ahead of them in A&E
Oh my goodness.
Just heard from OH - Fifty Six people ahead of them in A&E
I saw your post and thought not like you to be on this late. As well as being in an easy to clean area glad OH was home to take her. Not nice for either of you but you do the bulk of the caring and are only just getting over your bug.
They'll be another couple of hours I guess so try and get some sleep/snooze once you settle daughter.
I know its difficult Ann but could you at least lie down while you are waiting, even if you can't sleep? You're very likely to be on solo MiL duty tomorrow if she is too tired for daycare and OH is catching up on sleep.
Goodness Anne what an awful situation. I hope you are all ok.
Morning everyone,
GL, it does feel utterly 'bizarre' when our loved ones suddenly 'don't know' basic facts that we feel must be so ingrained and familiar that it is (to us) impossible to see how they could be forgotten. Mil has told me that She 'didn't know' that she has grandchildren - they used to be the centre of her world. That she 'didn't know' that OH and I were married - 23 years and counting! Even that she 'didn't know' that she had a son - the first time that happened must have been a real kick in the guts for OH. Even now, after months and months of knowing that she can 'forget' these things, I find a little bit of me thinking that 'No - she can't be serious!'. Its a hard one to get your head round xxx
I got an hour's extra peace in the end, Tin - not just better for me, but I think that the extra sleep can often help her
There seem to be quite a few folk with this lurgy, JM - some seem to shake it off fairly quickly, and others are like me and its lasting 2 - 3 weeks. Luck of the draw, it seems
Morning Slugsta - lol, comparatively, it wasn't a bad day No bad sundowning, the confabulations/delusions were not upsetting her for the most part, no nastiness, no escape attempts and just a mild bit of nagging towards bedtime. If I compare that to the awful delusions that poor Terry is witnessing her Mum going through, or read other threads on TP where people are dealing with violence, or extreme sundowning, or even invisibles or struggling with officialdom, then I reckon it really wasn't a bad day The behaviour of the night before, when she was quite deliberately faffing about rather than removing the pull ups so she could have fresh ones does tend to push my buttons. I suppose its not surprising that getting her settled in bed almost feels like the end of a days work for me, so I'm fairly eager to get her sorted and then go put my feet up - very aggrivating when she does childish things like that, especially when her whole demeanor makes it obvious its deliberate!
Terry, I really hope your Mum is more settled now, hun xxxx
When she did get up yesterday, we had more of the confabulations to deal with. She was turning down the job she had been offered in Butlins, she told me - she didn't like the look of the chef when she went for the interview! I couldn't resist saying that she was lucky to be offered the job, being as she is 74 - didn't they mind her age? She said she had lied and said she was 45, pointing out that she 'could gt away with that'. She went on to say that she had taken a job in a local pub - as a dancer!!!! I asked would she be pole dancing ? (I know, bad of me!) - she said she expected so, her new boss liked his dancers to do all the new jives and dances The mental picture that gave me nearly had me crying with laughter!
Settled her with a 'family film' - finding that certain movies can sort of keep her attention, not sure she follows them, but yesterday one of the Muppet Movies caught her eye, and we had an hour or so's peace. As soon as it was finished she started on a 'loop' that we then had off and on all day. Did S*** (her son) give a message to S*** about when he was picking her up? Only they were going home to his house and so she wanted to ask S*** what time S*** was coming for her?. OH was only in the kitchen and came through. 'S***, did S*** tell you when he was coming? You got the invitation, when am I going to S***'s house?'.
It was just so confusing! For the most part, she seemed to know that there was only one S***, her son - but was going on and on about him as though he were two separate people. She also said she knew that 'this' was her son's house - but still wanted to know when S*** was taking her to his house? Distracted her the first time with yet another film ('UP' this time, on Netflix) but once that film was over, she was off again. And it was that fixed, determined, not-going-to-be-distracted-and-going-to-keep-on-and-on-about-it type of situation. Not interested in any other film, or magazines, didn't want to fold undies or anything else we suggested to occupy her. Up and down from her seat, coming to me or OH with the same thing 'When is S*** coming to take me to his house?'. OH or I would point out that he was S***, she would say 'I know - did S*** tell you when he was coming?'. It was a complete brain mash and non-stop. In the end, OH told her to go and lie down and calm down. She argued she couldn't, she was waiting for S*** to come and collect her. Talk about banging your head on a brick wall! She eventually went up, came down half an hour later and straight back into the same thing. She would ask me, I would try and respond and she would completely blank me and go ask OH the same thing. She started to get really rude and cross, so OH sent her up again. At tea time, he called her down - she refused, so she was told 'That's OK - if you don't want your Sunday dinner, we can just bin it '- she was down in less than 3 minutes! Still the same thing and clearly very angry with us. Huffing and puffing, shovelling food in like there was no tomorrow, yet still taking ages to eat. We ignored - until she finished, stood up went to a stack of clean tea towels that I had folded ready to put away, grabbed the top one - and wiped her mouth and nose on it! That was it! OH ordered her back to her room and there she stayed. OH took her meds up at 8.30, I followed and got her changed into clean pull ups and she went to bed. We have had a lot of the 'nagging' lately, but she has been tending to go from subject to subject - this 'Where is S***?' went on more or less all day. We tried every which way to answer in a way that would satisfy her, but nothing we said worked. makes for a very long and incredibly frustrating day
She's supposed to have a shower at day care today - we'll see! OH in on another 12 hour shift, so hoping she is out of the 'Where's S***' loop - otherwise the end of the day might see me sat gibbering in the corner!
Hope you all have a good day xxxxx
Now he only knows vaguely who I am, and the other day he asked who I was, and how long had we known each other. When I told him about sixty years, he said, how can I have known you for sixty years and yet not know you? When I told him we were married, he said " We must the love each other then" That seemed infinitely sad....