Smoking problem. Any advice appreciated

Discussion in 'Younger people with dementia and their carers' started by Reds, Jan 16, 2016.

  1. Reds

    Reds Registered User

    Sep 5, 2011
    My husband has Alzheimer's but I wish he wouldn't go on quite so much about cigarettes. I allocate him a certain amount each day but he takes every opportunity to get extra ones and can nag me for more.

    I have to allocate them now as its like giving a child smarties and not being able to save any. He has mild COPD too and is on inhalers. Frustrates me to care for him when he has coughs but then wants extra cigarettes.

    I am wondering if I should go to the doctors about this problem as it drives me and the family made. I am sure this has something to do with his Alzheimer's rather than just an addiction due to the routine etc.

    I really don't think the vapour ones would help as they too could drive us mad and its an excuse for him to go outside so he can go up to people when perhaps he shouldn't.

    Any ideas would be good.

    Reds x
  2. fizzie

    fizzie Registered User

    Jul 20, 2011
    My husband was a smoker and had COPD. He died of lung cancer but he smoked valiantly all the way through right to the very last day. I'm not sure that your husband's problem is Alzheimers. As an ex smoker and the wife of a fully addicted smoker I think it is the addiction and to be honest life's tough enough without putting restrictions on cigarettes in my opinion. I would have hated to make my husband's life more miserable than it already was by even mentioning smoking - he died happy and the smoking drove me bonkers lol
  3. meme

    meme Registered User

    Aug 29, 2011
    I agree... life is tough enough without taking away a pleasure be it harmfull or addictive...if that's his choice accept it with gritted teeth x
  4. reedysue

    reedysue Registered User

    Nov 4, 2014
    Could he try an e-cigarette?
  5. 1mindy

    1mindy Registered User

    Jul 21, 2015
    My mum was a lifelong smoker. When she went into a home they kept the cigarettes behind the station.When she asked for onea staff member went outside with her. They never restricted her smoking. I suppose it was Mums choice. Eventually though she just stopped, we always thought she just forgot she smoked.
  6. pony-mad

    pony-mad Registered User

    May 23, 2014
    My husband was an ex-smoker! He restarted a couple of years ago and my policy was; why should I limit his pleasures when so many have been denied him due to the progression of the disease!!! He still smokes, but increasingly forgets to have one!!!

    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
  7. Tovah

    Tovah Registered User

    Jul 22, 2015
    You can quit smoking

    I was a very heavy smoker; up to 2 packs a day and my husband smoked cigars.

    When my husband had his stroke, we both quit 2 years ago,

    I loved to smoke. I admit it.

    However, if I didn't quit when my husband did, I would always be going outside, not to mention the cost.

    My husband would buy me a carton and I would run out of it so quickly that I would supplement the carton with other packs of cigs I would buy.

    Anyway, the book that helped the most and which is hailed as the best book on quitting smoking is: http://
    t just made sense to me.

    One of the other problems was that as my memory was getting worse, I was afraid of forgetting that I had a cigarette going and burn up the house.

    If your husband has smoking as his one pleasure, I agree with the others. Let him smoke under your circumstances and rules.
  8. Not so Rosy

    Not so Rosy Registered User

    Nov 30, 2013
    My Dad smoked for Britain especially when the Dementia kicked in as he couldn't remember just having put one out. I was buying him about 60 a day :eek:, plus I think neighbours gave him more.

    Even his Social Worker said it was his right to smoke, in fact it was written into his care plan that his second afternoon care worker was to check he had enough to last till I checked him after his evening meal otherwise he used to go AWOL looking for more or pressed his care line buzzer asking for a bottle of red and 20 Marlboro Lights.

    The first 3 care homes he went in had lots of staff that smoked within sight and smelling distance of residents rooms, in fact they were really using outside space meant for residents so of course his desire for ciggies continued.

    Now Dads Dementia has deteriorated, plus he can no longer see or smell cigarettes he has forgotten he ever smoked.

    Even his GP never put pressure on him to give up as it was really his only pleasure left.
  9. flystand

    flystand Registered User

    Jan 18, 2016
    Mt Pearl,St John's nl
    Hi, im new here, i am 33 years old, and am struggling with my mums diaganosis

    My mum is a smoker , with copd, her nurse was concerned about her breathing, so they put a nicotine patch on her, but she only rips them off . I noticed someone mention those E cigarettes ,good idea, my mum, had one before after her bowel surgery ,but started smoking again, I will get my mom one of those e cigarettes ,but everyone is stealing her stuff so maybe her nurse could lock it up for her. I know how frustrating it can be, sometimes I see my mums chest rise and fall ,its very scary, yet she wont stop, all the best to you ,god bless
  10. Bear44

    Bear44 Registered User

    Sep 28, 2015
    I lost my mom to copd, but I never told her to stop. It's her life and she knew the risks.

    My dad has dementia and smokes and likes to drink beer, I will not ask him to quit either one as it's his life and he enjoys it. Just my 2 cents.

    Dementia, Alzheimer's is horrible disease, (forgive me for being blunt) but unfortunately either Alzheimer's or copd is going to win in the end.
  11. jimmy gold

    jimmy gold Account Closed

    May 1, 2017
    Smokers begin to recover from the damage cigarettes do to the brain as soon as they give up the habit. Brain decline is not an inevitable part of ageing, it is something we can protect ourselves against by making changes to our lifestyle - with avoiding smoking being one of them.
  12. Spamar

    Spamar Registered User

    Oct 5, 2013
    OH was a pipe smoker. I wasn't keen but, like several others, decided it was the only pleasure he had left. As the disease progressed he started to forget the whole process of pipe lighting. He also didn't smoke - or forgot - when he was in respite. In the end, of course, he forgot all about it.
    He didn't have COPD, btw.
  13. Rageddy Anne

    Rageddy Anne Registered User

    Feb 21, 2013
    Hmmm, not so sure about that Jimmy... My husband was never a smoker and did everything right on the physical health front. His dementia is now advanced, and he's trapped in a body that's physically still quite fit.
  14. notsogooddtr

    notsogooddtr Registered User

    Jul 2, 2011
    I could never have lived with a smoker,not on moral grounds but simply because the smell makes me physically ill.
  15. Cghrmu

    Cghrmu Registered User

    Jun 2, 2017
    Still smoking

    I am an FTD sufferer, and I have always smoked, we loose so much of our mind and body pleasures due to FTD, why should we be deprived of a pleasure we do have (smoking)

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