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Six Years Ago

Boy Albie

Registered User
Jun 23, 2013
30
Norfolk
Six years ago I had a partner who was suffering from dementia. She was eventually assessed and taken into care. When I visited her at first she seemed quite normal, but after a while she just walked off. I was told she had dementia and that she didn't want to see me anymore. Her solicitor told me she had LPA and that any further visits from me would be taken very seriously, so I didn't go anymore. Recently, I learned that she has been taken elsewhere, but I know not where. I was the only one in her life and I really wanted to stay in touch, but now it seems impossible. I think about her every day, even six years later, and it is so hard. Does anyone have any advice, please?
 

Louise7

Registered User
Mar 25, 2016
1,794
This must be hard for you. Have you spoken to your GP about how you are feeling? They may be able to refer you for counselling, or some other type of support, as talking things through with a professional might be helpful for you.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
70,707
Kent
Hello @Boy Albie

This type of a break up must be even more distressing than what we know of usual breakups. I don`t know what to suggest for you other than counselling, where perhaps someone with acute understanding may be able to help you move on.

Perhaps your doctor could refer you.
 

White Rose

Registered User
Nov 4, 2018
420
Six years ago I had a partner who was suffering from dementia. She was eventually assessed and taken into care. When I visited her at first she seemed quite normal, but after a while she just walked off. I was told she had dementia and that she didn't want to see me anymore. Her solicitor told me she had LPA and that any further visits from me would be taken very seriously, so I didn't go anymore. Recently, I learned that she has been taken elsewhere, but I know not where. I was the only one in her life and I really wanted to stay in touch, but now it seems impossible. I think about her every day, even six years later, and it is so hard. Does anyone have any advice, please?
Just an idea but maybe she walked away for your sake because she didn't want to involve you in her care and perhaps wanting you to move on with your life. I can see this would be traumatic though and you just want to know where she is and how she is - would her former care home have a forwarding address and be able to pass a message on - although after 6 years she may not even remember you and will have deteriorated an awful lot in that time. But maybe if the old care home could get a message from the new care home to at least tell you how she is that might help you a little bit - after 6 years sadly she's really not going to be the person you used to know and love. Take care of yourself.