I've not posted here in a long time. I've been caring for my mother with dementia for several years now. Two of my siblings live close by, but aren't much help when it really matters. We have a mix of paid and family carers, but that doesn't always help...like the other day when I got sick. The paid carer was there, but... My brother wasn't working that day and said he"didn't have time" to go with me to the doctor because he was having a sale at his house. I found a friend who was available. Turned out to be a minor illness. I know the siblings have some priorities they think are important...I've learned over the years that my mum and I come way down the list. I've reluctantly accepted that. Here's what got to me last night when I talked with my sister who lives out of town. I told her my brother had no time to help me and didn't call to see how I was after the doctor visit. My sister's comment stunned me: "Well didn't he help you last time you were sick by taking you to the doctor?" Maybe he thought he "helped" me several months ago so he wasn't obligated now?