Mum passed 2 weeks ago, she will be ready for viewing next Tuesday, so that will have been three weeks after death, she was embalmed just over a week after passing, I'm told that's in fact quite late, since she is going into a vault where dad is.
The undertakers have said that she is presentable but not what she was, so I imagine that she has changed somewhat having been kept on ice, so to speak, for so long. It is only me that wants to go see her before they close the coffin but so many of my friends say that it's best left alone, that I should remember her how she was alive, I'm now 50/50 as to whether I should go or not, with no support from anyone on this.
I was with her when she died, she died at home, and I did in fact say my goodbyes that evening, she was with me a good 3 1/2 hours or so and was still warm, until the undertakers came at 2am, although there were paramedics here with me until almost 1am.
So what should I do, part of me wants to say a final goodbye, part of me feels guilty about not going along to see her, but if she looks bad or really different in some way I will remember that picture in my mind for ever. I saw my dad when he was all laid out and he looked great, but that was the day after he died and was fresh, mum was with me and other relatives. I'm a bit in turmoil over this now and simply cannot decide what to do.
The undertakers have said that she is presentable but not what she was, so I imagine that she has changed somewhat having been kept on ice, so to speak, for so long. It is only me that wants to go see her before they close the coffin but so many of my friends say that it's best left alone, that I should remember her how she was alive, I'm now 50/50 as to whether I should go or not, with no support from anyone on this.
I was with her when she died, she died at home, and I did in fact say my goodbyes that evening, she was with me a good 3 1/2 hours or so and was still warm, until the undertakers came at 2am, although there were paramedics here with me until almost 1am.
So what should I do, part of me wants to say a final goodbye, part of me feels guilty about not going along to see her, but if she looks bad or really different in some way I will remember that picture in my mind for ever. I saw my dad when he was all laid out and he looked great, but that was the day after he died and was fresh, mum was with me and other relatives. I'm a bit in turmoil over this now and simply cannot decide what to do.
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