Should I be worried -Assessment

abby

Registered User
Dec 19, 2006
182
West Country
Hello

Had a torrid 3 weeks so not been on TP but a situation has now occured that leaves me asking for advice please.

Dad went back to the ' memory man ' last week and had his Aricept upped to the maximum. He also had a CPN authorised.

I am Dad's appointee ( The Pension Service ) and the EPA 35 registration period passed last week. I am just waiting for the postie.

Today, while I was at Dads, SS called and my daughter spoke with them, saying, during a longggggggg 50 min conversation that they will be doing his assessment next week.

Now, putting aside my daughters feelings and concerns about the phone call......she was told this ' assessment ' was with ME at MY home. No Dad, nothing. To assess if I have the ability / capabilies to care for Dad. Yes, I am on the higher rate of DLA but have done a damn fine job so far in my opinion. Although they did say ' if all went well ' we might pop down to Dad's afterwards.......

So, what's all this about? Can they prevent me looking after Dad / future / affairs by deeming me not ' able ' by some sweeping look at my medical paperwork?

I am in a right fiz about this now and wonder if I have done the right thing asking for help. I only wanted some home care / help /assistance to run along side what I/ we are doing with the added bonus of a reduction of his £6.39 a day meals on wheels.....

Any help, as always, appreciated....

Abby
x
 

mel

Registered User
Apr 30, 2006
1,656
62
Sheffield
Hi Abby
Welcome back:)
i think this maybe a carers assessment for you.......not to see if you are fit.....but to assess what sort of help you need in order to look after your dad......they do take into account the needs of a carer too.........
You'll get more advice on this I'm sure
But try not to worry
Love Wendy xx
 

abby

Registered User
Dec 19, 2006
182
West Country
Thanks Wendy....;)

Nice to be back / home........

Having drawn strength and knowledge from TP for advice ..I now see the fight is yet to come..... and I have no idea where I / we go from here......was I wrongly under the illusion I could help Dad's future be easier:(

Abby
x
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
Hi Abby

I think Wendy's right, what you will get will be a carer's assessment. Nothing at all to worry about.

I've been assessed twice. The first time I was offered a carer for two afternoons a week so that I can go out and talk to people.

I asked for a reassessment last year, and was additionally offered day care, respite (which I turned down for now), and had visits from occupational therapy and continence nurse.

You should work out what you and your father need, and be ready to make sure you get them.

No-one will say you shouldn't be caring for your dad, I'm sure you're doing a great job. But there is a great deal of help out there, and you should take advantage of it.

Hope I'm not too late with this, I go to bed early!

Good luck
 

alex

Registered User
Apr 10, 2006
1,665
Hiya Abs

Think Wendy's right...........i don't think its something to assess your capabilities as a carer...........they just need to assess the help you need to make your job of caring a little easier.

Write down all the things you think you need............ hopefully you'll get some..........and fight them for the rest!;)

Good luck
Love Alex x
 

Grommit

Registered User
Apr 26, 2006
2,127
Doncaster
Jean has been ill now for over 5 years and, as far as I am aware, I have had no specific assessment of myself to see if I am capable of meeting her needs and, until I read this link, I was not aware that such assessments took place.

Of course, they may have been carried out without my realising it with such questions as "How do you feel about this, or that", but as for specific assessments of myself, none have been carried out.

I just wonder if these assessments are aimed at particular groups of carers and whether any other male carers have undergone the questioning of their abilities as a carer?
 

Tender Face

Account Closed
Mar 14, 2006
5,379
NW England
Hi Abby

Nice to see you back :)

The nearest I got to any assessment was a phone call from Social Services (following my Carer's Outreach worker contacting them on mine and mum's behalf) in which I was asked whether I was 'managing'. When I responded, 'Yes, for now' I was told they would close the file. End of.

I rather wonder if I had said, 'Well actually, I'm finding it all a bit of a strain' what might have been on offer there and then?

Just, a thought .....

Love, Karen, x
 

ROSEANN

Registered User
Oct 1, 2006
909
71
staffordshire
Hi Karen
I too asked for an assessment and uttered the fatal words yes for now when asked if I was coping to which I was told to ring back in six months time and they will see how things are.they did not want to know about the sleepless night due to my husband thinking there were things in the bed and having to change it several times a week some times a night, the fact that I have to take him every where with me because he dos`t want to be on his own.
So at the moment I will just plod on and hope for the best
All the best Roseann
 

Nebiroth

Registered User
Aug 20, 2006
3,511
Not to worry - it sounds like a carer assessment. This means that YOUR needs will be assessed - how well you are coping, what support you need, that sort of thing.

It is actually a good thing to happen - some people have to literally bang on the social service doors and demand one!
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
Tender Face said:
I was asked whether I was 'managing'. When I responded, 'Yes, for now' I was told they would close the file. End of.

I rather wonder if I had said, 'Well actually, I'm finding it all a bit of a strain' what might have been on offer there and then?

ROSEANN said:
I too asked for an assessment and uttered the fatal words yes for now when asked if I was coping to which I was told to ring back in six months time and they will see how things are
Hi Karen And ROSEANN

You have to tell them you're not coping, and your own health is suffering. You'll find they'll fall over themselves to offer help -- they know if you do collapse, they'll have to take over full-time care, and that would cost much more!

Give it a try.

Love,
 

BeckyJan

Registered User
Nov 28, 2005
18,972
Derbyshire
I like, Karen, was asked if I was coping. Because I replied 'yes for now' I was not offered any assessment (it was indicated that it was available!). I do not believe they can interfere in any way with your Power of Attorney or financial authority - they may ask for financial details to see whether you pay for any assistance, or not!.

You should have no reason to worry about the assessment - but if they tread into deep water, tell them to go away!!! (I was cross when they suggested that the sale of my husband's car could pay for care!!! - I knew that, but did not want them suggesting it when they had no idea of our other financial affairs!).

Also, if it is a question of paying for it - beware - as you may do better finding someone privately - just a thought.

Hope all goes well. Beckyjan
 

Gill W

Registered User
Jan 31, 2007
190
Co. Durham
My mum has been caring for my gran for some two years or more now and has never yet had an assessment of herself by Social Services. Indeed we have had to fight to get what help we have in place for gran.

Mum is almost on the point of a nervous breakdown from the stresses and strains of caring for Gran, but they never seem concerned about her well-being at all. They are more or less telling us that because Gran has family they MUST do ALL the caring. Even though she lives 25 miles away from us!

Never once has anyone asked my mum how she is managing or if there is anything they can do to help. Just the opposite in our experience!
 

abby

Registered User
Dec 19, 2006
182
West Country
Ok I am wondering now if SS eagerness to help is because of my ill health.
Now, call me cynical, but from all your replies it appears I am ' lucky ' being offered this assessment, could it just possibly be the case that if I croak Dad then becomes their 24/7 problem?:rolleyes:

Thanks for all your welcome backs ........and your kind words karen ;)
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
abby said:
......... could it just possibly be the case that if I croak Dad then becomes their 24/7 problem?:rolleyes:

Absolutely!. But you don't have to croak. Anything like nervous breakdown, hospital in-patient treatment, broken limb, etc. is going to cost them. So make sure you use that to get the help you need.

Love,
 

abby

Registered User
Dec 19, 2006
182
West Country
Ok...a question to any other ' lucky ' ones. I read reference to possibly thinking of private assistance if they ' dug deep '' How will I know ? I know Dad will be in the self funding bracket...so whats the situation? Or rather how is SS involement different to using private agencies?

I know he will have to pay for everything but how much can I insist upon....because Dad is very clever in company....sits there quiet, nodding and smiling as if he both understands and can hear ( neither is the case )...they won't see him as he was today...positivley horrid......gave my daughter an hour and a half of hell. She has never seen her G/dad angry , ever ! And this was most distressing for her. Dad on the other hand ranted and ranted and carried on ranting ............

He definatly is getting worse......calling mum ( deseased ) my name and doesn't know any family connections...... The hardest thing for me was last Friday when he threw away all of mum's precious belongings he has lovingly kept since she dies in '94. Even letters I wrote to them both as a child 40 years ago...torn in half and trashed....... oh I am rambling...sorry........

Abby
x
 

mel

Registered User
Apr 30, 2006
1,656
62
Sheffield
Hi Abby
Ok...a question to any other ' lucky ' ones. I read reference to possibly thinking of private assistance if they ' dug deep '' How will I know ? I know Dad will be in the self funding bracket...so whats the situation? Or rather how is SS involement different to using private agencies?

not sure...but is this where direct payments come in?
Never got that far with mum but I understand she would have qualified for this even though she would be self-funding.......
 

Gill W

Registered User
Jan 31, 2007
190
Co. Durham
Hi Abby

Your dad sounds as smart as my Gran when you describe how he is in company. Gran has a knack of getting her clothes on the right way & insisting she's fine, she doesn't need the help, it's us that's got the problem. It makes me chuckle when SS tell us to make sure that Gran know's they are coming to see her, they can't see her without her knowing they were coming. At what point should you tell someone who has absolutely no memory whatsoever that someone is coming to see her next week?! Today? The day before? Five minutes beforehand? How do you get them to remember that little snippet of info then?

I think its good that you're getting this assessment. I'm sure no one intended to make you feel you shouldn't be sceptical. At least they will see that you can't handle it all by yourself, I wish that was the case for me & my mum.

Naturally you have to be guarded with certain aspects, some of them shouldn't concern them, such as your personal finances, and be wary and alert to the leading questions.

Take all the help you can get sugar, you shouldn't have to run yourself into the ground.

Good luck with it & take care.
X
 

abby

Registered User
Dec 19, 2006
182
West Country
OK....Direct payments / self funding ? :confused: * best go do a search :rolleyes: *
So, because dad is over their financial limit......have I the right not to disclose both his and my financial situation ? I am guessing yes but looking for clarification and / or what I should be saying......

Wish there was an A-Z on what help I am able to ask for....despite everyone's needs being different, there must be a basic structure somewhere...* off for another search lol *