Should I be concerned?

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by john1939, Feb 13, 2018.

  1. john1939

    john1939 Registered User

    Sep 21, 2017
    140
    Male
    Newtownabbey
    Hello again.
    Today I took my wife to a large department store so that she could browse around for an hour or two.
    I positioned myself in the cafe which has a good view of the door so that I could keep a check against her leaving the store.
    I gave her a small amount of money as I like to keep going the fiction that she has her own money and is independent.
    She engaged in conversation with a security officer as we left the store and I overheard the word"knife".
    We arrived home, and as she took her coat off I glanced into her handbag and was concerned that she had bought an 8 inch carving knife. She does no cooking whatsoever and when I challenged her about it she became evasive.
    At the first opportunity I will secretly confiscate this knife and confer with her GP.
     
  2. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    4,567
    Female
    Scotland
    I would do as you have done and don’t mention it again. Don’t give any encouragement to obsess about it. Whatever was in her mind will go and move on to something else.
     
  3. Shedrech

    Shedrech Volunteer Moderator

    Dec 15, 2012
    6,206
    Yorkshire
    I agree with marionq - thank goodness you heard the word and saw into the handbag - but who knows, she may have been harking back to when she cooked hearty meals and needed such a knife
    maybe, though, it is time to be more vigilant during her shopping sprees - let her think you very much enjoy shopping with her, it's a treat for you
     
  4. love.dad.but..

    love.dad.but.. Registered User

    Jan 16, 2014
    2,937
    Maidstone.Kent
    I think you did the right thing it maybe something or nothing. She probably seemed evasive if she most likely couldn't remember what the reason was for buying it. Apart from that it sounds a good shopping trip
     
  5. john1939

    john1939 Registered User

    Sep 21, 2017
    140
    Male
    Newtownabbey
     
  6. john1939

    john1939 Registered User

    Sep 21, 2017
    140
    Male
    Newtownabbey
    Hello, The worrisome thing is that she had a history of violence against me, not with a knife, but with a kitchen roll wooden holder which she used as a club. She is on 17 pills per day which include anti depressives, tranquilisers, blood pressure and cholesterol control.
    Her mood is on a knife edge and I have to watch for any sign that might indicate a violent episode.
    Strangely when she first became violent, the GP was very reluctant to believe that her behaviour was abnormal, it took a mental professional to make the diagnosis.
     
  7. love.dad.but..

    love.dad.but.. Registered User

    Jan 16, 2014
    2,937
    Maidstone.Kent
    In that case perhaps if you repeat the department store trip shop with her and avoid the kitchen utensil area might be a good idea. If you feel unsafe at home if your wife becomes violent towards you phone the police. Others may have more advice based on your latest post
     
  8. rhubarbtree

    rhubarbtree Registered User

    Jan 7, 2015
    305
    North West
    Are you sure she bought the knife? Had she spent some money, was there a receipt? Many times when I am in department stores there is a man doing demonstrations and he gives knives away at the end. Might be an explanation. Keep yourself safe.
     

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