I'm a student nurse with five years experience caring for elderly people.
My gran has emphysema and bronchitis (degenerative lung diseases), previous heart attack and vascular dementia.
She does forget to take meds, sleeps in the chair sometimes, wears dirty clothes cus she thinks there clean, gets mixed up about who said and did what. She has started to say the wrong words sometimes.. I'm not sure if this is early or mid stage dementia.
She lives alone in the house she bought with my grandad. It has stairs but she can manage them at the moment if she takes her time. She has a carer who comes in at 9am ish but she usually dosnt want help with her shower, she does it herself or skips it. She has a tea time carer but she makes dinner before they come. This is when she dosent have a chest infection, they really knock her off.
I think she should have a carer at 7.00 to prompt her to take her meds and shower, one at 12.00 to make her lunch, one at 18.00 to prompt her to take her meds and cook and one at 23.00 to prompt her to take her meds and go to bed. She hates the carers coming and dosent think she needs them so its struggle to support her and with me and mum being so far away (5-6 hours drive) it's hard to judge.
Also she dosent cope with bills and stuff, my mum does that now but still needs to get some things signed over to her name cus the electric company ect wont discuss my grans account with mum.
I'm quite patient with her, her questions and confusion dosnet get to me much, the thing that annoys me most is her changing the channel when I'm watching something and she has forgotten it's the program I wanted to watch grrr! headbonk.gif
My mum cant cope with her for long, she tires easily after a brain haemorrhage, her and her partner really need to get away and get on with their lives.
Mum has been feeling more recently that she could just give it all up and put my gran in a home. My uncle causes trouble with it all and mum bears the most emotionally as she takes the most phone calls from my gran.
I wish I could be more help. I wish my gran would be accepting of help. She dosnt want to move out of her house but I would love her to move to my area so I could support her.
I'm thinking maybe the best way might be to ask her to move in with me.
I have a two bedroom flat and I live mostly in the kitchen, living room and bathroom. She could have my bedroom which is big enough for a double bed and bedroom furniture. She could also use the other spare room as her living room and come to "my end" of the house to cook.
Carers could come into my house and if need be do sleepovers or night shifts (so I could have the night off)
So fors:
Shes my gran and I love her
I couldnt stand to put her in a home although a small scheme might be ok but they are hard to get and I worry that by the time we have got to the putting her in care stage it will be rushed and we will have to take what we can get.
She would have time to settle in to my house before her dementia advances
Everything is on one floor here
I would get an allowance and I might get money from my family/grans estate, I ******* hope so tbh!
I could look after her better than someone who dosent know her
I have enjoyed looking after my rats, they have been very therapeutic, I think the responsibility of looking after another life(s) spurred me to look after myself.
It's always nice to get a hug from my gran and she is great to chat to wub.gif
She might be happier with company
Against
She dosnt know I smoke
She dosnt know I date women
I might get stressed or depressed having her here all the time (though my mum could take her for a week at a time every month or so)
I'm very untidy
She might feel she has lost more independence
This looks long so if your still with me thank you
My gran has emphysema and bronchitis (degenerative lung diseases), previous heart attack and vascular dementia.
She does forget to take meds, sleeps in the chair sometimes, wears dirty clothes cus she thinks there clean, gets mixed up about who said and did what. She has started to say the wrong words sometimes.. I'm not sure if this is early or mid stage dementia.
She lives alone in the house she bought with my grandad. It has stairs but she can manage them at the moment if she takes her time. She has a carer who comes in at 9am ish but she usually dosnt want help with her shower, she does it herself or skips it. She has a tea time carer but she makes dinner before they come. This is when she dosent have a chest infection, they really knock her off.
I think she should have a carer at 7.00 to prompt her to take her meds and shower, one at 12.00 to make her lunch, one at 18.00 to prompt her to take her meds and cook and one at 23.00 to prompt her to take her meds and go to bed. She hates the carers coming and dosent think she needs them so its struggle to support her and with me and mum being so far away (5-6 hours drive) it's hard to judge.
Also she dosent cope with bills and stuff, my mum does that now but still needs to get some things signed over to her name cus the electric company ect wont discuss my grans account with mum.
I'm quite patient with her, her questions and confusion dosnet get to me much, the thing that annoys me most is her changing the channel when I'm watching something and she has forgotten it's the program I wanted to watch grrr! headbonk.gif
My mum cant cope with her for long, she tires easily after a brain haemorrhage, her and her partner really need to get away and get on with their lives.
Mum has been feeling more recently that she could just give it all up and put my gran in a home. My uncle causes trouble with it all and mum bears the most emotionally as she takes the most phone calls from my gran.
I wish I could be more help. I wish my gran would be accepting of help. She dosnt want to move out of her house but I would love her to move to my area so I could support her.
I'm thinking maybe the best way might be to ask her to move in with me.
I have a two bedroom flat and I live mostly in the kitchen, living room and bathroom. She could have my bedroom which is big enough for a double bed and bedroom furniture. She could also use the other spare room as her living room and come to "my end" of the house to cook.
Carers could come into my house and if need be do sleepovers or night shifts (so I could have the night off)
So fors:
Shes my gran and I love her
I couldnt stand to put her in a home although a small scheme might be ok but they are hard to get and I worry that by the time we have got to the putting her in care stage it will be rushed and we will have to take what we can get.
She would have time to settle in to my house before her dementia advances
Everything is on one floor here
I would get an allowance and I might get money from my family/grans estate, I ******* hope so tbh!
I could look after her better than someone who dosent know her
I have enjoyed looking after my rats, they have been very therapeutic, I think the responsibility of looking after another life(s) spurred me to look after myself.
It's always nice to get a hug from my gran and she is great to chat to wub.gif
She might be happier with company
Against
She dosnt know I smoke
She dosnt know I date women
I might get stressed or depressed having her here all the time (though my mum could take her for a week at a time every month or so)
I'm very untidy
She might feel she has lost more independence
This looks long so if your still with me thank you