ok im in shock, im in so much shock i cant even cry.
i went to see my mom in the home yesterday for the first time. it brought back so many memories of my grandad having alzheimers and now my mom has it its like im being thrown back into it all over again. i mean, shes only 44, she should be having a go at me for not working hard enough, or missing me because i have moved out, i shouldnt have to be wiping her mouth because she cant swallow properly anymore. i keep thinking bout the future, knowing she wont really be in it, wont see her first grandchild, or watch me walk down the aisle. i wont be able to talk to her about womanly worries and laughing about the old times. i miss her so much, so so much.
ok back to reality.....
i went to see my mom in the home yesterday for the first time. it brought back so many memories of my grandad having alzheimers and now my mom has it its like im being thrown back into it all over again. i mean, shes only 44, she should be having a go at me for not working hard enough, or missing me because i have moved out, i shouldnt have to be wiping her mouth because she cant swallow properly anymore. i keep thinking bout the future, knowing she wont really be in it, wont see her first grandchild, or watch me walk down the aisle. i wont be able to talk to her about womanly worries and laughing about the old times. i miss her so much, so so much.
ok back to reality.....