Hi First time I have used this site, my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimers five years ago and has coped well with the help of Arricept - until now. She has had a lot of upheaval in her life recently, culminating in a move to Spain with my father, my husband and myself. There is no care for Alzheimers patients out here, unless you can afford to pay for it, plus my mother has not settled, she hates the weather (one of the reasons for them coming), the people, the place (it is too quiet), the food - everything. Her deterioration has been rapid. Now we have the verbal aggression, against me as well as my father, apparently we kidnapped her when she came to Spain. She point blank refuses to wear incontinence pads and even though I do the washing, ironing, cooking etc., refuses to give me her clothes on a daily basis. Consequently she smells, baths are a quick dip in and out again. We are moving my parents back to the UK to a retirement apartment close to the doctor they used to have and all the village facilities, my father is dreading it as he relies on my help. I am looking forward to it, my parents and I have never been close and this last eighteen months has been murder. My husband and I cannot go out alone without feeling tremendously guilty, we dread being at home because we could be called upon to sort out a situation that esculates each time. No one on your site seems to feel as I do, everyone is sympathetic to the victim of Alzheimers but I have had enough. My children have grown up and are successful in their own rights, my husband and I were looking forward to a life of our own, now it is like being a child again having to be accountable to my parents, yet being a parent also, looking after their needs. Am I the only one who feels like this?