Hi everyone, I'm struggling with my mums recent diagnosis, even though I'm lucky to have the support of my 3 sisters its certainly doesn't make it any easier. We had been trying to get a diagnosis for a few years but Covid didn't allow this to happen so i resented the NHS a bit as felt she could have been on tablets a lot sooner. Anyhow the tears flood often and i just can get my head around the fact that my mum wont know who i am somewhere along this crazy journey. I look at her and she just looks like a lost soul, she knows who we still all are but the conversations are very short and she is also extremely emotional and understandable. I guess my main concern right now is i don't want to see her as i just get upset, i avoid it to be honest and i know this isn't the answer but I'm just really struggling to get me head around it. Im then riddled with guilt as this isn't me going through this and pull my big pants up bit its a constant battle in my head the moment. Please tell me I'm not alone in feeling like this?
Hi hun, I have just joined this forum, and when I read your post I know just exactly how you feel. My mum has always been my best friend and I feel I'm losing her, in fact, probably lost our known connection already. After 2ish years of knowing she probably had dementia, a couple of months ago it was confirmed. She was my rock and guidance through the world Jackaroo, and I too finally need to pull up my big girl pants too - scary but maybe we need to see it as also a bit empowering. I spent the day with her today as my step dad needed some time to himself. We spent 3 hours colouring in colouring books, listening to Barry White and the BeeGees; my mum's continual repetition and me trying to enter her world. What I did want to tell you though, is that she said at one moment when she forgot something, she said 'it's the dementia . . . it's only a word though.' I asked her 'do you feel different, do you feel you've changed?' She said no, that she was just the same as she always was. I asked her if she was happy - she said 'very'. Jackeroo, at the moment, at the stage she is at for me, I feel her family are the only ones really suffering - for me, for her to feel happy, is good enough. I know things will change, progress, and I'm so scared about that, but have come to conclusion that as long as we surround her with love and do our best then that's all that we can all do. At the end of the day, my mum will not be alone in her suffering, we will all be doing it together - strangely there's some comfort in that xxx