My husband was diagnosed with Alzheimers three years ago at age 90. Until the middle of last year I was managing ok but realised I needed more help as incontinence was a problem at night caused by mobility. many wet floors, bed etc. I'm in my latish 70's so was getting so tired. In the middle of August my husband who was attending a charity time out for carers day had a stroke and was rushed to hospital. 24 hours later I was told to take him home as he did not need to be in hospital. He had been walking with the aid of a stick, now needed a frame could not wash, dress,shower in fact all the things he had been able to do albeit with help from me. My stepdaughter who lives in the west country came to help after a week when I was at my wits end. Even with two of us it was really hard. Regrettably we had to make the most awful decision about care. Live in care was totally impractical as well as expensive. He has settled very well into the second home, yes, we had to move him as the care he was receiving was totally inadequate. Now he seems happy is eating well and recognises me still which is a huge relief for me. My main problem is the guilt, I've let him down and miss him so much. We have been married for 43 years and have had so many happy times together. I keep telling myself I am lucky to have had such a wonderful husband for such a long time but how do you ever get over the emptiness. I only visit three times now I usually fall apart when I get home to think I've left him behind and he is never coming home. Does it ever get any better? I know he is getting really good care and does seem happy but I am the one who should be doing the caring.Sorry this is so long, I have wanted to post for a long time.