Ruth's funeral yesterday

Discussion in 'After dementia — dealing with loss' started by afghan, Mar 23, 2007.

  1. afghan

    afghan Registered User

    Nov 2, 2005
    10
    Kent
    My beloved Ruth was given a rousing sendoff yesterday. Church bells, choir and a packed church. I spoke the words I had been writing in my mind for so many years.
    I am coping well. When I feel sad I remember her choking on her food and the fact that every capacity had been removed from her. She is now free from Alzheimers, at peace, no longer suffering. It is only we that are left that now suffer.
    Loads of donations for the Alzheimer's Society that will be sent with a request that they go into the research fund. Oh for the miracle of a cure!
     
  2. mel

    mel Registered User

    Apr 30, 2006
    1,656
    Sheffield
    Hi Afghan
    i'm really pleased the day went well.
    be strong....we're all here for you
    Love Wendy xx
     
  3. nicetotalk

    nicetotalk Registered User

    Sep 22, 2006
    155
    stretford
    Hi Afghan
    Iam glad the funeral went well, our loved ones that pass over i know are at rest, and it is the loved ones left behind that suffer, take each day as it comes it has been a year since my mum passed over, my dad cared for her at home she was 62 when passed every one copes differently each hour that passes must be so hard you take care of yourself as i know she is deep in your heart

    kathy
     
  4. Irish_Lisa

    Irish_Lisa Registered User

    Feb 24, 2007
    37
    N.Ireland
    I'm pleased that the funeral went as well as can be expected for you. It's hard right now for you I'm sure but when I was upset or thinking too much I realised how it was a release for us both (me and my granddad). I miss him daily but I didn't want to watch him suffering day after day and granddad would never have wanted to end up as he did either, nevermind getting worse. I hope the days and weeks following are good to you and that you find peace and comfort. xxx
     
  5. Brucie

    Brucie Registered User

    Jan 31, 2004
    12,413
    near London
    Hello afghan,

    thanks for bringing us up to date. I am so pleased you feel you are coping well. I can understand that.

    Do take care of yourself and continue to keep us up to date with how you are getting on.
     
  6. daughter

    daughter Registered User

    Mar 16, 2005
    824
    Hi Afghan,

    I am pleased the day went well for you and you were able to say the words you wanted, it's so important I feel.

    I understand how you say you are coping, my Mum says the same about when the feelings of sadness come. Then she remembers how Dad was at the end and feels relief that his suffering is over. People ask her "how are you?" and she says "I'm ok", and sometimes she is, but at others of course there are many tears. A lot of the thoughts she had about the bereaved have been changed. She thought she might not want to talk about Dad for fear of getting upset, but she now likes to recount stories from the past to anyone who will listen and loves looking at old photographs and movies of Dad. As nicetotalk says, everyone copes differently.

    Thinking of you,

    love from Hazel.
     

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