Hello my friends.
We had, I believed, entered a more settled phase with Mum. Once a week she was going off with a very nice carer for a lovely walk, stopping off for a drink etc, and also she had started going to a social group held by the AS. She had also been attending a lunch club once a month held by Age Concern. Mum has now (apparently) told the organiser of the lunch club that she no longer intends to go, and for the last 2 weeks she has told the carer upon calling for her walk, that she has a severe migraine and couldn't possibly go out. When it happened for the second time this week I knew for sure that this headache was a definite ploy, and next week, I shall be there ready to ensure she goes. The 'walk afternoon' makes quite a difference to me. I will call in the morning and make sure everything is OK, then because she is going to have her afternoon occupied, I am more or less 'free'. By the time she gets back, she is happy to eat and settle in front of the TV .... I am feeling annoyed that she is now deciding not to do this and so making life more difficult for me.
Am I right to 'force' her to do these things? You know, it only takes one rainy day and for nothing going on for her to imply that she is so bored and fed up, with nothing to do. Having now tried to set up these things for her, which has taken time and energy, to have her decide what she will do and not do, behind my back, is making me very cross. Why is she able to think this all through, and yet not look after herselff? I also feel that she is only attending the social group because I collect her and drop her off! When this winter comes, she is going to be complaining, I know. Any thought would be much appreciated.
We had, I believed, entered a more settled phase with Mum. Once a week she was going off with a very nice carer for a lovely walk, stopping off for a drink etc, and also she had started going to a social group held by the AS. She had also been attending a lunch club once a month held by Age Concern. Mum has now (apparently) told the organiser of the lunch club that she no longer intends to go, and for the last 2 weeks she has told the carer upon calling for her walk, that she has a severe migraine and couldn't possibly go out. When it happened for the second time this week I knew for sure that this headache was a definite ploy, and next week, I shall be there ready to ensure she goes. The 'walk afternoon' makes quite a difference to me. I will call in the morning and make sure everything is OK, then because she is going to have her afternoon occupied, I am more or less 'free'. By the time she gets back, she is happy to eat and settle in front of the TV .... I am feeling annoyed that she is now deciding not to do this and so making life more difficult for me.
Am I right to 'force' her to do these things? You know, it only takes one rainy day and for nothing going on for her to imply that she is so bored and fed up, with nothing to do. Having now tried to set up these things for her, which has taken time and energy, to have her decide what she will do and not do, behind my back, is making me very cross. Why is she able to think this all through, and yet not look after herselff? I also feel that she is only attending the social group because I collect her and drop her off! When this winter comes, she is going to be complaining, I know. Any thought would be much appreciated.