1. totallyconfused

    totallyconfused Registered User

    Apr 18, 2016
    384
    GP wants my mother to go in for a week or two. She said we need a break and they can monitor her sleep problems, toilet troubles.

    I feel such guilt even though I am so tired, she was up 35 hours straight-she just fell asleep.

    Its the stress and trauma of moving, setting, then moving back, especially when she has severe memory loss. how will she react to coming home to us again?

    If we do it, whats the best thing to do-me and my sister care for her. should we not visit for awhile and let her settle?should we leave it to the siblings to visit for a few days/

    how have you all coped with it?
     
  2. lis66

    lis66 Registered User

    Aug 7, 2015
    238
    Hi totally confused I put mum in respite when dad was in intensive care,for two weeks ,it was the hardest thing I ever done ,my daughter took mum as I couldn't do it,I did go and visit mum although they tell you not to,as it is a complete break and rest for you, mum was just staying in bed all the time and I ended up bringing her home early to stay with me ,which I probably shouldn't have ,but your mum could settle really well xx
     
  3. Graybiker

    Graybiker Registered User

    Oct 3, 2017
    147
    Female
    County Durham
    Hi
    I can only tell you about my experience. Mam went to respite a couple of times, once planned, once an emergency, she is now in a home full time.
    If anything I was surprised how well it went. Mam would pack every day, preparing to ‘go home’, but she did that at home anyway.
    Mam is quite social so living at home , just with dad, was not very stimulating for her. She enjoyed having people around to chat to, even if the chat makes no sense
    I did go and visit but dad not so much as it was him she was living with. She was absolutely fine, staff very good and experienced at dealing with PWD.
    We told her the doctor had recommended she go there to convalesce. The routine, company and 24 hour care were very good for her.

    Please, take the opportunity. Dad didn’t take as much as he was offered and suffered for it.
    Hope it works out for you
    X
     
  4. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    5,738
    Female
    Scotland
    My husband is going to respite on Monday for one week to a care home he has stayed in annually for the last three years. It is excellent. I tape a sign on his wardrobe door telling him what date I will be back to get him and when I do he takes it in his stride, gets in the taxi and promptly forgets he's ever been there.

    I am going to visit two of my daughters in London for a few days as I haven't been able to visit them for six years. I'm looking forward to seeing what they have done with their houses and gardens and just having good long talks and laughs that make some kind of sense.
     

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