Home v care home is a very difficult decision. PWD can take quite a “hit” when taken out of their familiar surroundings, we were warned when searching for a care home that Mum’s dementia would almost certainly worsen appreciably. It can take many weeks for the PWD to adjust to living in a care home and witnessing the distress and constant pleas to go home can be very distressing for the family. And of course there are a range of homes so it may be difficult to decide which is suitable for your father. We saw some utter hell holes during our research and others which were considerably better staffed and more homely.
But on the positive side, once your father is in the right home and has settled, you can find reassurance that his needs are being met and he is safe and cared for. If he lives alone, he may find comfort in friendships with people who are on the same journey.
Mum is still in her own home but we have selected the right care home for her and her name is on a waiting list. I have been utterly torn between keeping at home and placing her in care. I am now confident that she will have her needs better met in the home that we have selected and are just waiting for the right moment to introduce her to it, with the help of the staff there.
Home v care home is a very difficult decision. PWD can take quite a “hit” when taken out of their familiar surroundings, we were warned when searching for a care home that Mum’s dementia would almost certainly worsen appreciably. It can take many weeks for the PWD to adjust to living in a care home and witnessing the distress and constant pleas to go home can be very distressing for the family. And of course there are a range of homes so it may be difficult to decide which is suitable for your father. We saw some utter hell holes during our research and others which were considerably better staffed and more homely.
But on the positive side, once your father is in the right home and has settled, you can find reassurance that his needs are being met and he is safe and cared for. If he lives alone, he may find comfort in friendships with people who are on the same journey.
Mum is still in her own home but we have selected the right care home for her and her name is on a waiting list. I have been utterly torn between keeping at home and placing her in care. I am now confident that she will have her needs better met in the home that we have selected and are just waiting for the right moment to introduce her to it, with the help of the staff there.
My advice would be to research care homes or nursing homes (depending on his needs) and get his name on a list. It is much better to be prepared than to have to rush around trying to find somewhere in an emergency. You don’t have to accept a place if one comes up, until you are ready. Once you and your family have made the decision you will feel calmer.
My advice would be to research care homes or nursing homes (depending on his needs) and get his name on a list. It is much better to be prepared than to have to rush around trying to find somewhere in an emergency. You don’t have to accept a place if one comes up, until you are ready. Once you and your family have made the decision you will feel calmer.
Thank you so much for such a reassuring post. I am very much a person who likes to plan ahead and what you have said makes so much sense. So I think I will start to look at care home options around and start the planning process 'just in case' Days vary so much from good to not so good - I'm sure you will know what I mean. Thanks again for making so much sense.