Residential Care Home concerns

[Darceybell]

Hi , I am new here, Thank you for letting me join.
I have recently had to place my Mother in a residential care home,
It's the hardest thing I have had to do so far. My Mother has Vascular Dementia and after a fall in her own home it was decided that she need full time care as she wonders during the night etc.
I was given a list of homes by mt local council , 5 in all.. After looking at the CQC reports we went to look at 2 that had the best report.
It's a real eye opener. There was just no way I could leave my Mum in these homes. Neither of them could garentee her safety. They both pointed out that as my Mum is mobile they could not garentee that they could get to her quickly in the night if they were dealing with someone else.
They pointed out Fire doors that she could get out of easily just by pushing the bar.
One home showed me her room and said to the left of her room was a fire door and the the right was a flight of stairs. This was on the second floor..
The second home said they had someone get out on the roof one night. They said they have to make the family aware of the risks..
Obviously I turned these homes down but I was then left with choosing lower CQC homes.
To cut a long story short we decided on a smaller home that seemed more secure.
My Mum has only been there 6 days.. obviously she is finding it hard to settle and I accept that but.
I visited yesterday and took her out for coffee, she told me she is scared of some of the staff, some are nice but she feels she has to keep quiet and keep her head down.
There is no entertainment and all they do is sit in the lounge.
I feel that my Mums mobiliywill just decline as there is no where to walk except to the dining room and back.
Or the garden and back.
Once we arrived back at the home I said I would do her hair for her.
I found that there was no hot water at the sink, then one of the Carers said oh you will only get hot water if you use the shower.
We had to Roll
Mums hair up in the lounge as there was nowhere else to do it, But this gave me some time to observe how things were.
There was another couple visiting their Mother in the lounge also.
I observed one particular member of staff speaking to a resident very harshly because she didn't eat all her dinner, The resident was quite obviously upset by her tone but did not retaliate, everyone else in the room just kept their eyes averted, the other couple looked at me and raised their eyebrows and shook their heads, I felt so bad for this lady and really had to bite my lip because I wanted to take the Carer to task over it but didn't want to make things bad for my Mum.
Once I had rolled my mums hair up we went to sit in the dining room . There was a carer popping in and out , once they all had their dinners the carer left. The room was so so quiet, nobody talked to each other.
One lady in a wheelchair hardly ate anything and another lady started to be really mean to another lady and got up and moved to a different seat next to a man and started leaning on him and getting anmorous with home, he clearly felt uncomfortable and tried to get her to stop but could not. The carer was nowhere to be seen. Eventually the carer came in to clear away the plates and again was very harsh on a resident that had not eaten much. He could not stick up for himself, I don't know if he was not able or he was to scared..
Ian just so so sad about it all and just don't know what to do or how to handle it without making it worse for my Mum. I felt there was just no compassion or patience from the staff.. sorry for the long post.
I did manage to speak to the other couple outside the home when we left.
They said their
Mum was moving to a nursing home very soon and they were very relieved as they were not happy with the home , but they were in the same position as me in that it was the best place they had seen compared to the others. This is the problem with non private homes.

 

[Bunpoots]

Hello @Darceybell . Welcome to the forum.

I'm sorry to hear about your worry about the carehome. Is the manager approachable?
If you can build up a good relationship with the manager you will be able to air your concerns. Perhaps ask how your mum is settling and then say what she's said in a non-accusatory way.

If you don't feel able to speak directly with the home then speak to your mum's social worker about your concerns.

 

[Sirena]

I'm so sorry this care home is such a miserable experience. Carers speaking harshly to residents for any reason is not acceptable, nor is the lack carers to mediate problems between residents. If they speak to residents like this in front of visitors, you wonder what do they do when there is no outsider to witness it. Your mention of the lack of compassion and patience indicates poor leadership so I am not sure how helpful the manager would be - have you met him/her, do you feel they are approachable?

My mother's care home is secure, no incidents re escapes, but there is also a lovely atmosphere with carers who enjoy their jobs and interact positively with residents. There are always at least two carers in the main lounge where most of the residents congregate.

The one point where you do have to be realistic is the risk involved re falls. No care home will be able to guarantee they can get to your mother in time to stop her falling. My mother has had several falls, despite being in a room with carers a few yards away. They can mitigate risks with use of pressure mats and regular 'obs', but as long as a resident is mobile, you have to accept there is a falls risk. But there is always someone there to summon help quickly.

I would speak to your mother's social worker and see what she can do to help. You might want to reconsider one of the other care homes.

 

[Jaded'n'faded]

No one should be spoken to harshly in a CH - that is unacceptable. Carers are there to help and assist the residents, not to control, manage or frighten them. It is a care home not a place of punishment.

Please don't think all homes are like this - they are not. I hope you can find somewhere better for your mum but the search for the right place isn't easy. Often the ones that look the best are not best in terms of care. And the CQC report will only show the current status of a home, not whether it is improving from the previous rating or on the slide.

I wish you strength and success in your search.

 

[canary]

Hello @Darceybell and welcome to Talking Point.

I wouldnt be happy about that care home either.

I am wondering what sort of care homes you are looking at - not all care homes are equal and IMO CQC ratings dont always convey the right impression as many of the care homes maintain their outstanding rating by not accepting and moving on the "difficult" residents who wander, resist personal care, develop incontinence and/or are a high falls risk. Decent dementia care homes will deal with all of these, but their CQC ratings might suffer. If you only have the easy early stages of dementia then you dont need so many staff either, so you can make the decor look nicer......

My advice would be to ditch the CQC ratings and go and have a look at places yourself. Dont go for the care homes that are mixed dementia and non-dementia - they are usually not secure and only accept people in the early stages of dementia. Go and look at dedicated dementia units (often called EMI units) and firstly, ignore the decor. Better to have good care in a scruffy home than bad care in a beautiful one.

Have a look around and note how the carers interact with the residents and also if there are times when there doesnt seem to be anyone around. People with dementia need patience and consideration and also, eyes on them all the time. Make sure it is a secure building. Look to see if they have access to a lift and if the stairs need a key pad to access it (which means the wanderers wont be falling down them). Look to see if there are people at all stages of dementia - if there are not, then probably once they get to a certain stage they get asked to move.

Ask about activities. Be brutally honest about her problems and ask them how they would deal with it. Also ask them what sort of behaviour they would not tolerate. If this includes wandering, trying to escape, resistance to personal care etc then look somewhere else.
Go for somewhere with a nice homely atmosphere with no unpleasant smells.

 

[Louise7]

I'm wondering if the reference to 'non private homes' means that the placement is council funded? If so the choice of available/suitable homes will be limited and it's not as simple as just looking around and choosing a home yourself. You have to find one that takes the LA rate and unfortunately not many do.

 

[Darceybell]

I'm wondering if the reference to 'non private homes' means that the placement is council funded? If so the choice of available/suitable homes will be limited and it's not as simple as just looking around and choosing a home yourself. You have to find one that takes the LA rate and unfortunately not many do.

Hi Louise7
Yes you are correct. I am very limited due to funding. I had to choose one out of five and if I had a choice I would not choose any of them. The one I had to go for was the least worse out of the five..
It's clear they are under staffed and also clear that the staff don't look happy in their work.

 

[Sirena]

@Darceybell, I realise that you have a limited choice, but did any of the other care homes appear to have a better atmosphere and happier staff/better management? I can't see how they could be much worse than this one to be honest, the most important part of a care home is the staff.

Having just read another thread, it reminded me that some members have had success with using an independent social worker, who has been very good at identifying the right care for their PWD.

 

[Palerider]

My heart goes out to you, very difficult. Just to let you know a code of conduct does exist for social care workers and assistants, it outlines the standards you should be able to expect from someone calling themselves a care worker:

https://www.skillsforcare.org.uk/Le...g-people/code-of-conduct/Code-of-Conduct.aspx

Sorry I'm not much help, but at least you can gauge the expectation you should rightly have

 

[Hazara8]

Th

Hi , I am new here, Thank you for letting me join.
I have recently had to place my Mother in a residential care home,
It's the hardest thing I have had to do so far. My Mother has Vascular Dementia and after a fall in her own home it was decided that she need full time care as she wonders during the night etc.
I was given a list of homes by mt local council , 5 in all.. After looking at the CQC reports we went to look at 2 that had the best report.
It's a real eye opener. There was just no way I could leave my Mum in these homes. Neither of them could garentee her safety. They both pointed out that as my Mum is mobile they could not garentee that they could get to her quickly in the night if they were dealing with someone else.
They pointed out Fire doors that she could get out of easily just by pushing the bar.
One home showed me her room and said to the left of her room was a fire door and the the right was a flight of stairs. This was on the second floor..
The second home said they had someone get out on the roof one night. They said they have to make the family aware of the risks..
Obviously I turned these homes down but I was then left with choosing lower CQC homes.
To cut a long story short we decided on a smaller home that seemed more secure.
My Mum has only been there 6 days.. obviously she is finding it hard to settle and I accept that but.
I visited yesterday and took her out for coffee, she told me she is scared of some of the staff, some are nice but she feels she has to keep quiet and keep her head down.
There is no entertainment and all they do is sit in the lounge.
I feel that my Mums mobiliywill just decline as there is no where to walk except to the dining room and back.
Or the garden and back.
Once we arrived back at the home I said I would do her hair for her.
I found that there was no hot water at the sink, then one of the Carers said oh you will only get hot water if you use the shower.
We had to Roll
Mums hair up in the lounge as there was nowhere else to do it, But this gave me some time to observe how things were.
There was another couple visiting their Mother in the lounge also.
I observed one particular member of staff speaking to a resident very harshly because she didn't eat all her dinner, The resident was quite obviously upset by her tone but did not retaliate, everyone else in the room just kept their eyes averted, the other couple looked at me and raised their eyebrows and shook their heads, I felt so bad for this lady and really had to bite my lip because I wanted to take the Carer to task over it but didn't want to make things bad for my Mum.
Once I had rolled my mums hair up we went to sit in the dining room . There was a carer popping in and out , once they all had their dinners the carer left. The room was so so quiet, nobody talked to each other.
One lady in a wheelchair hardly ate anything and another lady started to be really mean to another lady and got up and moved to a different seat next to a man and started leaning on him and getting anmorous with home, he clearly felt uncomfortable and tried to get her to stop but could not. The carer was nowhere to be seen. Eventually the carer came in to clear away the plates and again was very harsh on a resident that had not eaten much. He could not stick up for himself, I don't know if he was not able or he was to scared..
Ian just so so sad about it all and just don't know what to do or how to handle it without making it worse for my Mum. I felt there was just no compassion or patience from the staff.. sorry for the long post.
I did manage to speak to the other couple outside the home when we left.
They said their
Mum was moving to a nursing home very soon and they were very relieved as they were not happy with the home , but they were in the same position as me in that it was the best place they had seen compared to the others. This is the problem with non private homes.

This is a rather disturbing post. The quality of proper care and attention to correct application, especially in an emi environment, is a fundamental. There can be no place for a harsh or indifferent attitude to any resident. Such behaviour should be treated frankly without mercy. Management are responsible for the behaviour and efficiency of Care staff and you should not feel apprehensive about addressing this issue and with righteous firmness. Care per se remains a kind of Cinderella of healthcare and we hear of quite appalling events taking place under the guise of "care". CQC should be informed if you feel unhappy about the situation. Alas, when those in charge advocate cameras be installed in Homes to address such issues you do despair. But never accept mediocre or casual answers to seriously considered questions. These people are vulnerable and they belong to you. Above all, if love is truly in play, these problems should not arise. That word "love" evades so many people in respect of its true meaning. Sad