Reminder of Diagnosis

[SarahMissy]

Hello all,
My mum was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s this week after a few years of us (her family) worrying about her memory. My question is how it is best to respond if she asks what is wrong with her? For example, my dad had to explain she had dementia when she asked what her new tablets were for as she had forgotten her diagnosis from this week. I am reading as much as I can about everything but just some simple advice would be much appreciated. Thank you for reading.

 

[silkiest]

Hi @SarahMissy, I think it depends how your mum responds - for a short while after diagnosis my mum would accept the diagnosis but 2 years later I dare not mention it at all as she gets extremely angry and tells me I am lying. Sometimes she is more likely to respond to a joke about her being an old woman now . Even mention of poor memory can upset or annoy her. Sometimes only changing the subject will work unfortunately

 

[Scarlet Lady]

I think I would go with ‘age-related memory loss’ if you think she’d accept that without undue distress. Even if you explain about the dementia, she’ll forget anyway. When my aunt was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s , she blithely informed the consultant that everybody of her age had that and what else could you expect after you reach 90? I’m still not sure if she really understood or not! Anyway, Alzheimer’s or dementia wasn’t really mentioned again in her presence, although she was so stone deaf, it probably wouldn’t have mattered.
By the time we’d tried and failed with Donepezil, she had no clue what any of her medication was for.
In short, I would keep explanations to the barest minimum she will be happy with.

 

[My Mum's Daughter]

By the time we got home from the doctor's, Mum had forgotten all about her diagnosis. 2 years later and we've never mentioned it again.
Daily tablet is "to help her memory"

 

[SarahMissy]

Thank you so much guys, I appreciate your quick responses. She actually just called me and asked me ‘do you know I have dementia’ so I said yes and let her have a cry. A few minutes later she was laughing like normal. I love the idea of calling it age related memory loss it sounds much kinder, and tablets to help her memory is a good suggestion. This is all so helpful, thank you.

 

[Shedrech]

Hello @SarahMissy
A warm welcome to DTP

I'm glad you've found suggestions useful ... do have a read around the forums as there's much good information and a great deal of sympathy and understanding here ... keep posting with anything that's on your mind: sharing does help

 

[Duggies-girl]

Slight memory problem worked for dad.