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Tamara Gordon

New member
Mar 24, 2020
Dear All,

My father has dementia and does not understand what's going on so refuses to self isolate. His girlfriend who cares for him along with me is over 70 and so vulnerable but put at risk by his comings and goings. When we have tried to stop him from going out he gets angry. He refuses to wash his hands a lot or even at all. I live in Wales. He could come to us but he will refuse to stay. We feel he is a danger not only to himself but his girlfriend and others. Someone suggested we get tranquillisers from the doctor to help settle him. What do you suggest


Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
South coast
Hello @Tamara Gordon and welcome to DTP

Im afraid that this is a problem that is being repeated up and down the country and Im not sure that there is an answer. Im afraid that I have no experience of tranquillisers, but Im not sure that the doctor would be happy to prescribe them.


Registered User
Jul 27, 2019
My husband has just created the attached poster for my parents to print and display at home as my dad also getting agitated because he doesn’t understand why he cannot go out. Hopefully it will be of help to you.


  • CV Poster.pdf
    96.5 KB · Views: 418


Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
hello @Tamara Gordon
a warm welcome to DTP
a worry for you and your father's partner

I suspect nothing will get through to your father, unfortunately, but worth a try putting up some notices ... will they be receiving the letter the Gov are sending out, maybe that can be shown to him

I doubt the medics will prescribe any tranquiliser, though it may be wise to email your father's GP and let them know the situation so it's on record and the GP may have suggestions

is it feasible for his partner to live elsewhere, if your father can look after himself ... if not, can she separate herself as much as possible (I appreciate your father may not understand this either) and herself keep the hygiene suggestions so her risk is lowered

might you/his partner also put a card in a pocket of whatever he wears to go out saying he has dementia and doesn't understand the new rules ... so, if eg police are involved, there is some explanation of his behaviour


Registered User
Feb 2, 2020
I understand the situation completely. I have lost count of the times I have explained to my mum why she can't go out except for a quick stroll for fresh air. I have tried writing notes, bought a big whiteboard some time ago to put reminders on "What board"? was the response. It is a pointless exercise. High anxiety is the order of the day.