My mum is 78, 79 in January and she has recently been diagnosed with Alzheimers having been struggling with forgetfulness for a while, this has come as a shock after watching my dad succumb to it nearly 10 years ago. We saw a gradual decline with him over many years but with mum it just seemed to come all at once. She is going through a very angry and aggressive stage at the moment, she is in hospital after a hip replacement and kidney infection and is shouting, swearing, hitting out at people. She is refusing medication, food, throwing her plates across the floor and basically refusing any help. She is doubly incontinent and just screams that she wants to die. She was found with a cable wrapped around her neck and is now on 15 min obs. Due to this Covid we are not allowed to visit her so I am thinking that she may be feeling abandoned as well as confused. She has lost a great deal of weight and is just skin and bone. My siblings and I are feeling helpless. Its taking all my strength not to burst into tears all the time and and try to carry on as normal. My dad practically died in front of me, i had only left the house for 30 mins and when i came back he was gone, I had to step over him on the floor. That's how I remember him, so part of me doesn't want to visit my mum because I don't want to see her like that, is that horrid?