I doubt that there is anything that anyone can say but I'm having a go ... My mother has dementia and will not admit it. She will not go to the memory clinic (so I'm guessing that she has dementia). She will not accept any help at all - not from me personally, from Social Services or even listen to advice so that she can put things into place that will help her help herself with her memory. She was stuck in her bath for over 4 hours a few months ago and at last I got her assessed by SS and an occupational therapist. They deemed her to be coping and to have capacity. They said she was unsafe using the bath and toilet. She has been advised, following the bath incident, not to use the bath. She will not allow a carer to come in and help. She will not accept the installation of any safety aids/bars as advised by the OT. (She is bathing again and took great delight in telling me she was using the bath once again which tells me she knows exactly what she is doing). She refuses to write down any appointments or arrangements and thus puts others out because the arrangements go wrong. She has always been difficult and thinks that the world revolves around her. She asks me to give her examples of how her memory has been at fault. I am finding it very very difficult to cope with her as I have a lifetime of difficulties with her to bring to the party. I have been depressed for the last 2 months and, after doing everything I can possibly think of to try to help her, realise that I have come to the end of the road. I am now trying not to worry about her and am leaving things to evolve as they will. I have a sister who will not help. I have two daughters and the three of us ensure that one of us has rung her each day to make sure she is OK and not in difficulties. (She also refuses to wear her emergency call button, so we are worried that if she should fall or hurt herself in some way she would not be able to summon help.) Dealing with her makes me ill, but I try to stick to it. I usually take a friend with me for moral support. When I see her I don't know what to talk about - I hear that one is not supposed to ask questions, or 'do you remember' ... conversation is almost impossible. My guess is that there is simply nothing whatsoever I can do; no-one can make anyone have treatment or get a diagnosis or co-operate. I think I just have to change my attitude and accept the situation.