Not so long ago a present for my beautiful wife would mean perfume or clothes. Today I am looking for a child's learning to dress toy with zips, laces and buttons - something for her to fiddle with and keep her amused. Putting away childish things just doesn't apply to us does it. I am in tears thinking about our situation, I hate this bloody disease.
Putting away childish things.
- Thread starter TedW
- Start date
Oh! TedW I have to respond to your thread,but don't know what to say other than my heart goes out to you. You obviously love your wife and are doing all you can to make her feel happy. You're right--this disease is so cruel to both patient and carer.
As you say TedW this is a dreadful disease. It is so difficult to try to find something that provides a semblance of enjoyment for our loved ones. When I see that look of despair on my wife's face I want to do more than give her a hug to make her feel better. I want to find something that makes her life that little bit more enjoyable. Things are at a very early stage here and the odd dance or silly song together can lift things. However, I don't know what we would do without Youtube listening to the golden oldies and our granddaughters renditions. Hope you find something that helps.
Know how you feel Ted-and I feel very sorry for you and your Wife. My Husband always used to have a book in his hands, now it's a cushion in the form of a raccoon. It's just something that he can occasionally pick at. Heartbreaking for all concerned.
You sound very down; do you have any support? Does your Wife go to daycare?
Keep posting. You will always find support here.
Take care
Lyn T
You sound very down; do you have any support? Does your Wife go to daycare?
Keep posting. You will always find support here.
Take care
Lyn T
Hey Ted, I know it doesn't make it any easier to know that this boat we are in must be massive because there are so many of us in it, but you must know that however much love you give her is most appreciated by her, even though she has difficulty showing it.
Just keep on caring and loving and giving her the things she is happiest with.
Will see you, and all those who have posted helpful and heartfelt comments in response on here, in some other place at a later date.
Just keep on caring and loving and giving her the things she is happiest with.
Will see you, and all those who have posted helpful and heartfelt comments in response on here, in some other place at a later date.
I'm coming along to add my loving thoughts to help the others in lifting your spirits, Ted. That sounds like a wonderful learning aid you are looking for and will be sure to give your wife much to do. I am so sorry for you and for us all. This is a grim disease indeed. All the very best X Shelagh
PS I have found that a short length of bath chain made up of little chrome balls is a very useful fiddling thing. Although it can get "lost" easily. Also, there are cushions or smsll blankets of cloth with different textures attached, aimed at discovery, which is where I think our loved ones go to try to make sense of it all. X
PS I have found that a short length of bath chain made up of little chrome balls is a very useful fiddling thing. Although it can get "lost" easily. Also, there are cushions or smsll blankets of cloth with different textures attached, aimed at discovery, which is where I think our loved ones go to try to make sense of it all. X
Just sharing your grief, Ted. You are doing a marvellous job, although it probably doesn't feel like it at the moment.
Sent from my GT-N5110
Sent from my GT-N5110
Hi Ted
I hope you don't mind me posting a link from a children's shop but when I saw your post this shop came to mind. She is expensive but is probably washable - you would need to check.
http://www.elc.co.uk/Learn-to-Dress-Lily/134248,default,pd.html#q=Dress
There are blankets here
http://www.alzproducts.co.uk/dementia-sensory-tactile-products-for-hands.html
I hope you don't mind me posting a link from a children's shop but when I saw your post this shop came to mind. She is expensive but is probably washable - you would need to check.
http://www.elc.co.uk/Learn-to-Dress-Lily/134248,default,pd.html#q=Dress
There are blankets here
http://www.alzproducts.co.uk/dementia-sensory-tactile-products-for-hands.html
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Thanks.
Thank you everybody for your support and helpful comments/links. I tried several shops this morning without any success but thanks to 'ONLYME' I have sourced, online, exactly what she would like at the Early Learning Centre store. It is a large teddy bear with clothes and a bag. It has zips, buttons, laces etc and as she has always had a soft spot for Teddy Bears I'm sure it will be a hit with her. We are not in the UK but I have spoken with my son who is paying us a visit next week and he is bringing one out for her. Thank you all once again, it is good to know that support is there when we need it.
Thank you everybody for your support and helpful comments/links. I tried several shops this morning without any success but thanks to 'ONLYME' I have sourced, online, exactly what she would like at the Early Learning Centre store. It is a large teddy bear with clothes and a bag. It has zips, buttons, laces etc and as she has always had a soft spot for Teddy Bears I'm sure it will be a hit with her. We are not in the UK but I have spoken with my son who is paying us a visit next week and he is bringing one out for her. Thank you all once again, it is good to know that support is there when we need it.
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How sensitive and caring of you to think of this. And how lucky your wife is to have someone like you.
Dear Ted, I have similar feelings as my hubby has dementia. He used to be an avid reader but no longer able to do so due to poor brain function and it breaks my heart to see him so often shredding paper tissues obsessively. I'm going to have a look at Early Learning and the other websites.
It's great that your son is visiting next week - teddy bear sounds like a lovely idea.
It's great that your son is visiting next week - teddy bear sounds like a lovely idea.
How sensitive and caring of you to think of this. And how lucky your wife is to have someone like you.
Thank you Scarlet. I made a promise 46 years ago and I know completely that if our rolls were reversed she would do exactly the same for me. I really do consider myself to be the lucky one and although, at times, it is so challenging and distressing I consider it a privilege to care for her and to afford her all the love and dignity I can provide.
L.B. I am sorry to hear that you are suffering like so many others who are caring for our loved ones. My wife was also an avid reader and our house is filled with her books. I have tried reading to her but her attention span is very low and she tends to get angry and confused with the whole thing. Do give the websites a visit. I have seen several things designed for children that may be helpful for us, non destructible books being one!
So glad to read of your success Ted. A teddy sounds like a wonderful present. Please do keep in touch so we can find out how your wife likes it and give you some well-deserved support at the same time. It would be good to hear from you. X Loving thoughts.
Pride & Prejudice
Hello Ted - as you mentioned your wife's love of books, wanted to say that I recently bought a "young readers" version of Pride & Prejudice which she might enjoy hearing you read if she liked Jane Austen. The illustrated pages make the story easier to follow and discuss, there are screen shots here:
http://www.usborne.com/catalogue/book/1~CB~CBSF~5091/pride-and-prejudice.aspx
Many apologies if your dear wife is now beyond this.
Hello Ted - as you mentioned your wife's love of books, wanted to say that I recently bought a "young readers" version of Pride & Prejudice which she might enjoy hearing you read if she liked Jane Austen. The illustrated pages make the story easier to follow and discuss, there are screen shots here:
http://www.usborne.com/catalogue/book/1~CB~CBSF~5091/pride-and-prejudice.aspx
Many apologies if your dear wife is now beyond this.
Hello Gigglemore.
Thanks for your suggestion, I will certainly give it a try. She was a great Dickens fan and has all his novels, short stories and also various biographies on the man. I have ordered one of her favourites, David Copperfield, I will let you know how it goes.
