What is most apparent from this thread is how many differences we have, although in other ways we are all alike, having had our lives touched by dementia. The thing I have most in common with others is how my relationship with my cared-for persons (both parents) changed so much over time, in my case with (but no doubt without) dementia in the mix.
I always thought my mum was reasonable, caring, strong and kind but that was actually my dad's influence on her and he was her 'rock', keeping her stable. Once he developed dementia and that was gone, everything that she really is returned tenfold. No one's fault - that's just how they worked as a couple.
I agree with the sentiment that we have to look after ourselves to be able to care for someone else - but again the definition of looking after yourself is different for everyone. In my case I would have had more care in place for my dad - mum kept the true nature of his condition a secret until he became impossible for her to care for - again, very common. She accepted help for him arranged by someone else (me) but would never have sought it herself.
I respect everyone's opinion even though I don't agree with many of them.
As the wonderful Maya Angelou said - "We are more alike, my friends, than we are unalike"
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I always thought my mum was reasonable, caring, strong and kind but that was actually my dad's influence on her and he was her 'rock', keeping her stable. Once he developed dementia and that was gone, everything that she really is returned tenfold. No one's fault - that's just how they worked as a couple.
I agree with the sentiment that we have to look after ourselves to be able to care for someone else - but again the definition of looking after yourself is different for everyone. In my case I would have had more care in place for my dad - mum kept the true nature of his condition a secret until he became impossible for her to care for - again, very common. She accepted help for him arranged by someone else (me) but would never have sought it herself.
I respect everyone's opinion even though I don't agree with many of them.
As the wonderful Maya Angelou said - "We are more alike, my friends, than we are unalike"
Sent from my SM-G935F using Talking Point mobile app
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