Pushed from Pillar to Post

Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by Trich, Oct 7, 2007.

  1. Trich

    Trich Registered User

    Aug 16, 2007
    31
    France
    I have not posted for a while and at that time was celebrating our achievement in getting s.s to agree to fund dad in a residential home. That was short lived as he was there for one and a half days and was unfortunately taken back into hopsital with a urinary tract infection. This totally wrecked him and he was bedridden for a while. This didn't stop him from having 4 falls while there. Once the bed rails were down although the nurse says not! This was a brand new hospital but understaffed and they could not cope with Dad. He did become agressive when they tried to put incontinent pads on him but I think this was the indignity of it. If they had taken the time to walk with him he could have used the toilet. They also managed to lose Dad's teeth so he was having difficulty eating and was loosing weight again. Anyway we were just so relieved to get him out of there. When the home manager saw him in hospital they said they couldn't cope with him as he was very unsteady and his room was on the first floor. So back to looking for another unit. This time we looked at EMI and dementia nursing homes. My sister choose one with a very good report and had a good look round. She made it clear about dad's wandering and that sometimes he could be aggressive. No problem they said they had an identified dementia floor with necessary security. Dad had an assessment by the manager and moved in last Friday. Unfortunately due to a major c....up they placed Dad into the physically disabled wing and he caused problems all day wandering into people's rooms (no security there). When my sister arrived he was in a state of disarray. One slipper on , trousers hanging off and a vest. Apparently he had also been walking round naked at one time! Staff did not want to confront him as he was being uncooperative. Bearing in mind that this place had a dedicated dementia unit you would have thought that the nursing staff there could have helped with the behaviour. His medication has been upped to 2 tablets of Quetipine daily although again without consultation with family. This doesn't seem to help anyway. Most of the time he is refusing to take medication. I just can't stop thinking of what my poor dad must be going through. I am not there as am abroad and I know my family are just coping but I am so frustratred and desperately unhappy about what is happening. The manager is saying he doesn't remember my sister visiting and seeing the dementia unit and is blaming social services for lack of information. My sister was called to the home as dad was being agressive and he punched a nurse who was trying to give him medication. Apparently he has also hit a resident. Another sister found him wandering alone yesterday as the manager said they were just not confronting him and letting him do what he wanted!!! After giving him a cup of tea and some food my sister managed to calm him but he couldn't remember anything that had happened. So back to Dad being moved yet again. I saw a post on TP which said ", EMI homes should not accept people whose illness is causing extreme aggression or violence. There are more specialized units with much higher staffing ratios run as part of the national health service for such patients". I did not know this and assumed that EMI/dementia units could cope with agression and the violence which can be part of the behaviour of people with dementia. I am just soooo angry that dad has had to put up with this traumatic weekend and am worried about what is happening to him when my family are not around given their attitude of 'leaving him alone to do as he pleases'. Has anyone any suggestions of what we can do. Social worker obviously not involved until Monday. Dad doesn't have a doctor as he hasn't been anywhere long enough. The hospitals give treatment while he is there but it seems to cease on discharge. Who should be taking ongoing responsibility for his care? Maybe his medication needs changing and then he would be OK in an EMI unit and not needing more specialist care. Sorry for the ramble but had to get it out!!! If I ring the family we only end up more upset and frustrated.
    TrichX
     
  2. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,896
    Kent
    Dear Trich, what a nightmare.

    I don`t understand the staff at the home `backing off` and leaving him to his own devices. He is in their care and should be cared for.

    Could your sister phone the emergency SS and say how unhappy she is about the lack of care your father is receiving.

    The staff at the home will be unable to change his medication without a doctor`s advice, but emergengy SS should be able to get some action.

    Poor man, what is he going through.

    Please let us know what happens.

    Love xx
     
  3. Trich

    Trich Registered User

    Aug 16, 2007
    31
    France
    Hi Sylvia,
    Thanks for your reply. I have looked up the emergency social services number and rang my sister who was on her way into the home. This sister has not visited before as she lives further afield so will view things with fresh eyes. She has agreed to ring the emergency number if necessary and get him out of there if they cannot offer more than the avoidance care he is getting at the moment. Thanks again, something positive for me to hang on to. Will keep you posted.
    TrichX
     
  4. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,896
    Kent
    Well done Trich.

    At least you can feel you are trying to do something positive to help.

    Love xx
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.