Hello,
My mum is showing early signs and we have been trying to sort things out for the future. My father passed away 2 years ago from dementia. I am an only child in my 30s and executor for his will. I loved caring for dad but the finance side, to me I was out of my depth and it just seemed like endless admin that got in the way. The last 5 years have been very difficult with no support.
I agreed to be mum's power of attorney but she has a very complex estate, lives in a large house and is a landlord. I work full time and am 200 miles away. I have asked that she sell off her flats so at least I don't have to be a landlord and things are simplier. I am worried I wont be able to fit all this around work and being so far away on top of arranging and managing her care needs in future. She doesn't want to sell anything which is far enough, it's her life, so we are looking at other options.We don't really have family that are young enough to do it.
It is also complicated as when my father was ill with dementia, mum treated him badly. Whilst I have tried to forgive this as I know how hard caring for someone with dementia is, it's difficult as she isn't sorry and lies to the family about what happened to cover herself. I'm not sure if this is some sort of mental illness or just the stress or what. But, it is difficult nonetheless.
Has anyone had a solicitor as the power of attorney? Or know of anyone who has? Does this work well? Obviously would rather it not be too expensive although she does have money from the rents to be able to afford fees so not too much of a problem. I am worried that a solicitor wont have the family link to mum and could perhaps just go for easy option for them not what she wants.
My mum is showing early signs and we have been trying to sort things out for the future. My father passed away 2 years ago from dementia. I am an only child in my 30s and executor for his will. I loved caring for dad but the finance side, to me I was out of my depth and it just seemed like endless admin that got in the way. The last 5 years have been very difficult with no support.
I agreed to be mum's power of attorney but she has a very complex estate, lives in a large house and is a landlord. I work full time and am 200 miles away. I have asked that she sell off her flats so at least I don't have to be a landlord and things are simplier. I am worried I wont be able to fit all this around work and being so far away on top of arranging and managing her care needs in future. She doesn't want to sell anything which is far enough, it's her life, so we are looking at other options.We don't really have family that are young enough to do it.
It is also complicated as when my father was ill with dementia, mum treated him badly. Whilst I have tried to forgive this as I know how hard caring for someone with dementia is, it's difficult as she isn't sorry and lies to the family about what happened to cover herself. I'm not sure if this is some sort of mental illness or just the stress or what. But, it is difficult nonetheless.
Has anyone had a solicitor as the power of attorney? Or know of anyone who has? Does this work well? Obviously would rather it not be too expensive although she does have money from the rents to be able to afford fees so not too much of a problem. I am worried that a solicitor wont have the family link to mum and could perhaps just go for easy option for them not what she wants.