Post burnout, must go on
I knew I'd reached crisis point. My Dad knew I'd reached crisis point.
We decided that in the best interests of all concerned it was time for a care home for my Dad.
Enter plea to social worker (we are not self funding).
I said that I could not continue helping my Dad. I thought that if I withdrew my labour they would see that my Dad needed to be in a place where "all of his needs may be more likely to be met" They agreed to assess his needs and I rented a caravan on a week to week basis. Staying away for the whole week was horrendous. Apparently he was asked what he wanted to eat? He doesn't know!!!
Every entry in the carer's log said that Joe was okay or Joe was fine. There was no record of the regular falls or incidences of incontinence. Neither was there any note of the look of desolation on his face. I tried to stay away and talked myself into thinking that it was working having 4 x a day carer's coming in because he doesn't meet the criteria to gain entry to a care home. I could have a life again before it's too late for me also. Four weeks on and tough love is not for me. I can't bear it any longer. I'm back to square one so I have to work smarter so that I don't burn out again so soon.
Another four weeks have gone by. Dad is looking more content and being more compliant. He is taking liquid paracetamol three times a day which seems to help. I have a carer comes in on weekdays to help him wash and dress and he has attended a support group twice on a weekly basis. I go once a week to an art class.
I wanted to share my recent experiences because I was at rock bottom, however, my mindset has somehow shifted in a positive way and I hope this might resonate with some of you
I knew I'd reached crisis point. My Dad knew I'd reached crisis point.
We decided that in the best interests of all concerned it was time for a care home for my Dad.
Enter plea to social worker (we are not self funding).
I said that I could not continue helping my Dad. I thought that if I withdrew my labour they would see that my Dad needed to be in a place where "all of his needs may be more likely to be met" They agreed to assess his needs and I rented a caravan on a week to week basis. Staying away for the whole week was horrendous. Apparently he was asked what he wanted to eat? He doesn't know!!!
Every entry in the carer's log said that Joe was okay or Joe was fine. There was no record of the regular falls or incidences of incontinence. Neither was there any note of the look of desolation on his face. I tried to stay away and talked myself into thinking that it was working having 4 x a day carer's coming in because he doesn't meet the criteria to gain entry to a care home. I could have a life again before it's too late for me also. Four weeks on and tough love is not for me. I can't bear it any longer. I'm back to square one so I have to work smarter so that I don't burn out again so soon.
Another four weeks have gone by. Dad is looking more content and being more compliant. He is taking liquid paracetamol three times a day which seems to help. I have a carer comes in on weekdays to help him wash and dress and he has attended a support group twice on a weekly basis. I go once a week to an art class.
I wanted to share my recent experiences because I was at rock bottom, however, my mindset has somehow shifted in a positive way and I hope this might resonate with some of you
