Just wanted to ensure others don't make the same mistakes we did. Although you may feel as though you don't want to remember your loved one as they were once the dementia starts taking over and so refrain from taking photos and video.... Or alternatively you are concerned about dignity for once the dementia starts taking over, your loved one may no longer be able to pose for photos or you may feel that perhaps you are taking photos of what they cannot give permission for....If you can take photos or video do so. Our mistake was thinking as Dad went downhill how bad he was and how terrible the situation was but then later down the track, you think of that same stage and think how marvellous he was back then, how you wish you could remember how good he was back then compared to where he is now. What seems bad now is nothing compared to where they are headed and although I don't want to be all doom and gloom I really don't want others to make the same mistakes as us and not keep a record of their loved one through each stage. There are so many levels of interaction that we don't realise. Even now in Stage 7 I wish I could capture those moments where I get a smile from Dad or a laugh but now he is in a home I find myself questioning the appropriateness of taking photos and so refrain. I did take video of him when he was in respite and noone had any objections, it was uncomfortable to do so, but if I ever have children I would love for them to know my Dad and not just the good stuff, my Dad even when he is dribbling is my Dad and it is my ethos that we face the bad with the good. The philosophical rambling stuff that you should just ignore if you don't like my usual blatherings: I know some will disagree but there will be others who see the world like I do. For example there was a horrible story about abused children on 60 minutes last night and my partner knowing how much that sort of thing upsets me because of my own difficult childhood asked me why I watched it. I said to him, that somebody has to, somebody has to listen to their story, if nobody listens it will just be brushed under the carpet and forgotten, I will sit here and watch it so that I can tell others and warn others. Same with dementia if nobody wants to know the bad stuff if nobody ever faces it it will continue to go on. It is not until a large amount of people can no longer brush it under the carpet that anything will be done about it. I realise that many don't have the strength to face the horrible stuff and thats okay, but for those of us who do force themselves to face the pain, don't feel that you are doing so for no reason except to hurt and feel pain, you are doing a good thing. You are the people who recognised what Hitler did to the Jewish people and objected, you are the people who don't just accept the situation but fight for a difference. It can be a lonely path with little reward but somebody has to do it, if there is going to be change. Last but not least, you are keeping your loved one company through this nightmare.