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Phone Calls to Care Home

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by Wigan, Jan 22, 2016.

  1. Wigan

    Wigan Registered User

    May 5, 2013
    73
    Hi

    I am just looking for your views on whether you think ringing a care home every morning and every evening to ask how a parent is seems unreasonable. We have done this since mum moved in just over 12 months ago and have now been told to ring once per day.

    Thanks
     
  2. Beate

    Beate Registered User

    May 21, 2014
    11,716
    Female
    London
    Personally I think even that is excessive. Can't you ask for a status report by email once a week or so and trust that they'd inform you if something was wrong in the meantime?
     
  3. fizzie

    fizzie Registered User

    Jul 20, 2011
    2,739
    I think you should be able to phone whenever you want to. I think perhaps that once a day is a good idea from your point of view but having just visited a care home where the majority of the residents had no visitors, family or otherwise I love to hear that people are keeping in touch. Do you feel that they may not phone you if there is a problem?
     
  4. Quilty

    Quilty Registered User

    Aug 28, 2014
    1,056
    GLASGOW
    I think it is a lot of phone calls. They should phone you if there is anything important to talk about. What is your biggest fear? What else could you do to help with that?

    Agree with others - maybe a regular email from a named person might be a good idea. It is very hard when you are caring. How often can you visit?
     
  5. Missy

    Missy Registered User

    Dec 18, 2006
    71
    That seems a lot to me. Imagine if every resident had someone ring up about them twice a day. The care staff would not be able to do any caring but would be fielding phone calls all the time.
     
  6. onlyme1

    onlyme1 Registered User

    Sep 10, 2011
    105
    scarborough
    I'd say once a day is more than enough. care home my mum and dad are in always ring me with any info or issues and I see them twice weekly too. I'd feel a bit of a nuisance if I rang every day.
     
  7. fizzie

    fizzie Registered User

    Jul 20, 2011
    2,739
    I wouldn't want to wait for a weekly email for a parent or loved one - it would feel far too impersonal and I'd feel as though I wasn't being caring enough - but that is really personal view. Care homes don't mind at all visitors going in every day - most actively encourage visits, short or long. Do you live a long way away?
     
  8. Quilty

    Quilty Registered User

    Aug 28, 2014
    1,056
    GLASGOW
    I live nearby and visit every other day. I email the nurse email if I have questions or concerns as I find I get a better answer, as the staff can give it their attention as time allows. The staff phone me if they have any concerns or need to tell me about falls etc. I tend not to phone as the staff are always busy looking after the residents. However, if I lived further away I would probably phone a lot more.

    If I had concerns I would phone so perhaps the issue is we dont understand all of the circumstances here. We all need to find a way of working with the care homes.
     
  9. Beate

    Beate Registered User

    May 21, 2014
    11,716
    Female
    London
    My OH isn't in a care home but attends a day centre so it's slightly different. They send me a status report once a week plus let me know if he runs out of pads or there is anything else I need to know. In turn, I email or call if I have a question or need to tell them something. But I wouldn't call on principle every day. I trust them enough to let me know if anything's the matter. At some point you have to develop trust and let them do their job. They should take your phone call whenever you call but at the same time there ought to be a particular reason for it. That's just my opinion.
     
  10. TinaT

    TinaT Registered User

    Sep 27, 2006
    7,095
    Bolton
    It is hard to say if anyone thinks twice a day telephone enquiries are excessive without knowing why you feel the need to do this. You may be in exceptional circumstances which warrant this.

    Best wishes TinaT
     
  11. fizzie

    fizzie Registered User

    Jul 20, 2011
    2,739
    Yes I think you are right too but it is different because you see him each night. I think it is about trust but if you can't see someone each day then perhaps it is a way of keeping that link. I think a lot of people feel very cut off once someone goes into a care home and I do know quite a lot of people who visit every day or a few times a week. It must be very hard if you are a long way away.
     

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