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Personal hygiene

GrahamH

New member
Jul 21, 2019
3
0
Hello.
I hope someone can help me with a slightly delicate problem.
My wife has Alzheimers and recently she's stopped showering every day. I've tried to encourage her but that often ends in us arguing.
I have asked her calmly why she doesn't shower daily and tried to explain the need to do so but all she says is "I don't like it". I have tried to shock her into keeping herself clean by telling her she smells, which she does, but nothing is working.
Does anyone have any ideas?
 

Scarlet Lady

Registered User
Apr 6, 2021
104
0
Unless you can substitute a bath for the shower, I agree with @Jessbow , a strip wash is the only answer, although that may not be without its difficulties.
As I understand it, many PWDs find it hard to tolerate a shower. The drops raining down on their over sensitive skin can feel like needles to them, although they can’t really articulate this. My aunt has this issue and as her home has only a shower and no bath, it’s problematic. We are still looking for a solution, especially as washing at the sink is becoming almost an impossibility.
 

Jale

Registered User
Jul 9, 2018
599
0
Mum never would shower, she didn't like the feel of the water on her, but she could usually be persuaded to have a wash.
 

Wildflowerlady

Registered User
Sep 30, 2019
599
0
My dad refused to bath or shower and this went on for the last three years of his life. Carers had to strip wash dad daily as he had lost bowel control and wore a catheter I can say they did do their best. Obviously it was not the best way to keep dad really clean but its all dad would allow. My understanding was he was fearful of not only water from the bath/shower but getting into it as well. I believe this stemmed from the fact we found him in the bath late one morning before it was apparent to us he had dementia. Dad was in the bath for several hours because we couldn't get him out as he was not willing to assist us in removing him plus we couldn't be sure if he had hurt himself there was no water in it and didn't look like there had been. We ended up keeping him wrapped up making him tea /sandwiches and had to call an ambulance. The ambulance took several hours to come took dad to hospital where he stayed for a few days and he was treated for a urine infection, his kidney function was poor and it was then that he had a permanent catheter fitted and arrangement for him to receive carers visit four times daily. I think you may have to consider strip washes at least for now perhaps your wife may accept something else in the future but dad never did.
 

Thethirdmrsc

Registered User
Apr 4, 2018
513
0
I wouldn’t have had the energy to shower my OH every day, but I got him into it once a week. If he didn’t feel like it, then he just shaved, a wash of the face and teeth and that was it.
 

Suesue.G.

Registered User
Aug 9, 2020
37
0
I can only manage to persuade my OH to have a shower once a week. He is meticulous about cleaning his teeth and likes to maintain his beard, with a little help . I make sure he has clean clothes every day. When he does shower, he seems to enjoy it
 

silkiest

Registered User
Feb 9, 2017
453
0
Hi @GrahamH, MIL is hit and miss with baths as she thinks she has one twice weekly. Sometimes the only way is to prepare the bath and then act like it was her plan (she won't shower at all). Our main problem was hair washing - she firmly believed she was washing her own hair and would not let myself or the carers do it for her. The problem has been solved by taking her regularly to the hairdresser as she accepts them washing her hair. Other people on this forum have found other solutions such as dry shampoos and wet wipes.
Sometimes I have found it is the clothes that smell more than the person - could that be a problem with your wife ? I have to remove dirty clothes from the wardrobe and wash them as MIL does not live with us. Other people that live with their PWD will try and remove clothing at bedtime etc.
 

GrahamH

New member
Jul 21, 2019
3
0
Hi @GrahamH, MIL is hit and miss with baths as she thinks she has one twice weekly. Sometimes the only way is to prepare the bath and then act like it was her plan (she won't shower at all). Our main problem was hair washing - she firmly believed she was washing her own hair and would not let myself or the carers do it for her. The problem has been solved by taking her regularly to the hairdresser as she accepts them washing her hair. Other people on this forum have found other solutions such as dry shampoos and wet wipes.
Sometimes I have found it is the clothes that smell more than the person - could that be a problem with your wife ? I have to remove dirty clothes from the wardrobe and wash them as MIL does not live with us. Other people that live with their PWD will try and remove clothing at bedtime etc.

Hello.
I hope someone can help me with a slightly delicate problem.
My wife has Alzheimers and recently she's stopped showering every day. I've tried to encourage her but that often ends in us arguing.
I have asked her calmly why she doesn't shower daily and tried to explain the need to do so but all she says is "I don't like it". I have tried to shock her into keeping herself clean by telling her she smells, which she does, but nothing is working.
Does anyone have any ideas?

Hello.
I hope someone can help me with a slightly delicate problem.
My wife has Alzheimers and recently she's stopped showering every day. I've tried to encourage her but that often ends in us arguing.
I have asked her calmly why she doesn't shower daily and tried to explain the need to do so but all she says is "I don't like it". I have tried to shock her into keeping herself clean by telling her she smells, which she does, but nothing is working.
Does anyone have any ideas?
Thanks to all that replied with good information.
I have learned new things, ( never too late) and will make necessary changes.
Thanks again.
 

asriela

Registered User
Oct 17, 2021
19
0
Also, dont worry about her hair because it cleans itself after about 8 weeks - ideally you would use water but my mothers hair hasnt been washed for 3 months and it is soft and clean looking with no smells.

My mother is bed bathed every day by a carer but when she was a bit more compos mentis she would use baby wipes. I told her they were special wipes from the doctor to help protect her sensitive delicate skin and she used them with me telling her what to do.

I have known of people who say thta we all wash too much anyway and as long as private areas are washed, we can go without even water washing because the skin is self cleaning. It takes a few weeks to rebalance though and for that time the pongs are many and various so I personally have never had the courage to try this!
 

Harky

Registered User
Oct 13, 2021
24
0
Thanks to all that replied with good information.
I have learned new things, ( never too late) and will make necessary changes.
Thanks again.
It's difficult getting my wife into the bath, usually end up getting her to stand in it and i assist her with washing. As to her smelling, does she go to the toilet herself. My wife used to but found she was damp and smelling. My solution is to assist her every time she goes as I found she wasn't wiping herself and also, she'd try to sit down with her underwear still on.
 

Thethirdmrsc

Registered User
Apr 4, 2018
513
0
I also use something my mother used for her hair, called Nil Aqua. It’s liquid you put on your hair, rub in and towel dry, and leaves the hair clean. My hair is quite short, so I use it if I don’t feel like a shower.
 

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