Just wanted to share this because it has really touched me tonight:
My mother is 86 with vascular dementia. She lives in sheltered accommodation with a warden during working hours and she has care visits in mornings and lunchtimes.
At 8.30 tonight I got a call from her phone - she never uses it so I wondered what it could be. It was some random guy called Tony who said he was visiting a neighbour and had seen my mother as he arrived, sitting in the lobby in her coat expecting to go out (ie for me to take her out) He thought it a bit odd, going out in the dark at that time, but went to see his friend - then on leaving, he found her still there wandering around holding a card I had written that said "Wednesday 2pm " with me to the shops (I do this as reminders for her) He asked her if he could help and she told him she had to go out but she wasn't sure how to.. realising something was amiss he took her back to her flat (she remembered the number!), found my number in her care plan and called me. He suggested I come up to calm her down and offered to wait until I did. I said I'd come immediately but would have to walk (20 minutes) because I had had wine for dinner (ok, few glasses!) and so was over the limit. This stranger Tony said not to worry -he would come and get me and take me to my mother's - there in 5 minutes. As I waited outside our house in the dark and the pouring rain, there was a moment when I did wonder if he might be some mad mass murderer, but then he turned up and I got in, so it was too late by then
Turns out his mother had dementia and he recognised the signs. He dropped me off at the front door of the sheltered accommodation and I thanked him very much, went in and sorted out my mother.
But the thing is - he didn't have to do any of that! He has never met my mother; no connection with me, no reason to get involved. It was just a kind, generous act. It reminded me that, actually, people often ARE kind; we just sometimes forget.
My mother is 86 with vascular dementia. She lives in sheltered accommodation with a warden during working hours and she has care visits in mornings and lunchtimes.
At 8.30 tonight I got a call from her phone - she never uses it so I wondered what it could be. It was some random guy called Tony who said he was visiting a neighbour and had seen my mother as he arrived, sitting in the lobby in her coat expecting to go out (ie for me to take her out) He thought it a bit odd, going out in the dark at that time, but went to see his friend - then on leaving, he found her still there wandering around holding a card I had written that said "Wednesday 2pm " with me to the shops (I do this as reminders for her) He asked her if he could help and she told him she had to go out but she wasn't sure how to.. realising something was amiss he took her back to her flat (she remembered the number!), found my number in her care plan and called me. He suggested I come up to calm her down and offered to wait until I did. I said I'd come immediately but would have to walk (20 minutes) because I had had wine for dinner (ok, few glasses!) and so was over the limit. This stranger Tony said not to worry -he would come and get me and take me to my mother's - there in 5 minutes. As I waited outside our house in the dark and the pouring rain, there was a moment when I did wonder if he might be some mad mass murderer, but then he turned up and I got in, so it was too late by then
Turns out his mother had dementia and he recognised the signs. He dropped me off at the front door of the sheltered accommodation and I thanked him very much, went in and sorted out my mother.But the thing is - he didn't have to do any of that! He has never met my mother; no connection with me, no reason to get involved. It was just a kind, generous act. It reminded me that, actually, people often ARE kind; we just sometimes forget.
