Dear Brenda,
can't really offer any advice, only some experience. The decision will have to be yours and you'll make the right one in the end, I'm sure.
My great-aunt had a severe brain haemorrhage (after a series of ministrokes) which left her unable to swallow, speak, move the right side of her body. When she was first in hospital, she was on a drip for fluids, because the docs weren't sure she'd last. In fact, the decision was made by the family at some stage to take her off the drip and enable her to pass away peacefully, which we knew was what she would have wanted. Still, a horrible decision to have to make. Anyway, after three days off the drip and constant monitoring by the docs and nurses, my aunt showed very strong reactions to certain tests which were carried out, and she was put back on the drip. She continued to stay "strong" and "stable" in the condition that she was in, there were even some slight improvements, such as she was awake more, she returned pressure when you held her hand, she looked and felt for your hand if you rested it on her chest or the bed, she followed your voice when you spoke to her by turning her head in the direction from which the voice came.
There came a point where different nutrition had to be considered since the drip for fluids wasn't really enough. So she was fitted with a naso-gastric tube, which she hated and wanted to pull out. She tolerated it eventually, but the risk of her pulling it out was too high, so the docs suggested PEG feeding because there was no immediate sign of a deterioration and long-term feeding had to be dealt with in one way or another. She had a PEG fitted, which was totally unproblematic, no obvious discomfort, she dealt with it really well and tolerated the feed. It was explained to us really well what would happen and how the mini-operation would be done, we had information leaflets to look at and several really good kind nurses and doctors explained patiently and over and over again what would happen. We were so worried.
The procedure was carried out under local anaesthetic, lasted about 30 mins, and for the first 12 hours she was closely monitored before they allowed a first feed to run through. At first the feed was run really slowly so as to make sure she tolerated it and didn't vomit and that her digestive system was working ok too. The next day the speed was upped, and she was monitored again very closely to make sure it was all ok. It worked well and her calorie intake was increased at some stage as well in order to help her maintain her weight and put weight on.
She passed away about 6 weeks after the PEG had been fitted, but her death had nothing to do with the PEG. She had contracted a virus which resulted in vomiting and that in turn resulted in a chest infection. She died of bronchial pneumonia after we decided we didn't want her on antibiotics but just made comfortable and let nature take its course.
Take care, thinking of you at this time. Your post brought back many memories.
Tina