Dear all Had a really bad conversation with mum last night. She's recently drawn out large sums of money from her bank account (within the space of 24 hours). I called her to check all was (as OK as could be expected) and fobbed her off with some story that the bank had called me to check the withdrawals. (I have an unregistered EPA and access to her bank accounts). I also discovered from my brother that she 'gave' him £100 because 'he looked like he needed it'. My concern was not that she gave him the money but that her reasoning behind it seemed somewhat bizarre. What of anyone else who 'looks like they need it'?! So, immediately she starts yelling down the phone. Telling me to mind my own business. That I'm ruining her life. Interfering. Her money is nothing to do with me and she can spend her money when she wants on what she wants as there's nothing wrong with her. That I want to put her in a 'sanatorium'. All this was at volume that was exceptionally LOUD She told me she wanted a peaceful Christmas and wanted to spend it on her own. Mm, right, so she can eat cheese sandwiches for days on end (after scraping off the fur coat that a lot of her food seems to be wearing these days)!! She bizarrely said: "we don't have the conversations we used to have". I say 'bizarrely' as of course, this is true. How can she remember we don't have those conversations and yet not have any conception of the reason why? Although I felt hurt by what she said, I also felt that I just couldn't be ar*ed with her! Of course I care and will continue to do so, but I'm not - for the forseeable future anyway - going to flog myself to death like I have been doing for the past 18 months. What's the point? I'm assuming that she won't remember the conversation as the last time this happened (I disappeared with a book and a glass of - very pleasant white wine - into the kitchen), she came in and wanted to know why I was avoiding her. This was after I'd wrapped up all her presents/sorted Xmas cards whilst she sat there and read the paper. How awful that this disease (Vascular Dementia) makes the sufferer so selfish and unaware and at other times almost 'normal'. Hey ho. Onward and upward. Am going off to finish MY Christmas shopping! Hope you all have a peaceful Christmas. No doubt some of us will be visiting TP over the holiday for our dose of sanity amid the madness! Sorry for the rambling post. Just wanted to get it off my chest!