1. lacey1962

    lacey1962 Registered User

    Jan 9, 2016
    38
    Female
    Crawley
    Help I am panicking my mother is 90 and has dementia for about 5 years. She was managing at home with 3 carers a day and day centre twice a week and me popping in several times a week. Tonights carer phoned to say one of her neighbours had to climb though an open window at mums as she decided to go out alone ( first time in 3 years) , the neighbour asked if she had a key to get back in and she said no only my watch. His wife looked after mum till he could break in and unlock the front door. My question is do I try live in carers, care home or put cameras on the doors with sensors . I know we cant double lock the front door as she needs an escape route in case of an emergancy. Has anyone got any ideas please.
    Thanks
    Sally
     
  2. Trekker

    Trekker Registered User

    Jun 18, 2019
    157
    Female
    London
    It is time, I’m afraid, @lacey1962 to call SS and explain you need an urgent assessment for your vulnerable mother, whom you can no longer keep safe. When my mother, also 90, wandered off in the night 6 months ago, and was found barefoot in her nightie, she ended up in hospital as it just wasn’t safe anymore. They wanted to send her home with just carers, then with a door alarm where I would get called, day or night, nearby or on the other side of the world. I refused, politely but firmly, explaining why - and this is important as otherwise you will be left to deal with an impossible position- and eventually they found her and my 87 year old father a flat in an extra care housing facility with onsite careers, day and night, and a door alarm the carers set after last visit. If this goes off then carers are alerted and can come quickly.
     
  3. charlie10

    charlie10 Registered User

    Dec 20, 2018
    287
    Hi @lacey 1962.......I can't advise about the problem of wandering, as my pwd isn't mobile enough to do it. However while you make arrangements to keep her safe, could you consider giving a key to your neighbour so that they can at least get her back into the house even if all the windows are shut. I hope you can find a solution.....such a very worrying situation for you all, and no solutions are ever easy when it comes to dementia :(
     
  4. Moggymad

    Moggymad Registered User

    May 12, 2017
    337
    Female
    A keysafe on an outside wall would at least give access to the house if it happens again whilst you consider other safety options
     
  5. Bunpoots

    Bunpoots Registered User

    Apr 1, 2016
    2,818
    Nottinghamshire
    I agree with @Trekker - you need an urgent SS assessment for your mum as she is putting herself at risk. In the meantime a key safe and a spare key with a neighbour is a good idea.

    My dad went out last summer at 1am and frightened his elderly neighbour by knocking on her door as he couldn't find his way home. He hadn't left the street!
    The police were called and because of a previous incident his name and address were on file as a vulnerable adult - otherwise he'd have been waiting in the police station til I discovered him missing next morning..

    It was a few weeks later, after he'd been found by his morning carer in his back garden - starkers - that I started looking at carehomes.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.