I haven't visited TP for months, because it's now well over a year since my mother passed away, and I think I coped pretty well in the early weeks and months, partly because her suffering and misery was over, partly because there was so much to do. Partly because I knew I had a new kind of freedom. And I don't think I felt too much guilt - or rather I didn't think that, but now I'm beginning to wonder, because for the past few months - from around the first anniversary of her final illness - I've been feeling very up and down. Physical stuff - loss of appetite, difficulty eating, etc - as well as just not feeling as happy and clear as I should, because things are fine, and I'm very lucky. My mum's AD and, in particular, the suffering of her final weeks, still comes back to me so much, and I know that bereavement isn't simple, even when the loss is of a very old and ill person. Still, I'm just wondering if there are others who've come back to TP a long time after, partly because they're still suffering some after-effects. I do get angry with myself, because time is passing, I'm getting older, and I believe we should make the most of every minute. No big deal, especially when so many of you are in the worst parts of this, so don't worry about posting replies - unless this happens to hit a sore spot with any of you.
All very good wishes to you all.
Jeannette
All very good wishes to you all.
Jeannette