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Out of MY mind


Registered User
Sep 9, 2013
Hi All
I am a new member, not set up profile etc yet. Trying to get used to this site. My Dad was diagnosed with vascular dementia earlier this year. It is as they say 'early stages ' I am however unsure of what that exactly means. Dad is on medication, Aricept and I have to admit I have noticed a steady decline in his confusion/abilities. Really not sure if I am even
accepting What is happening. I am in attendance with dad on a post diagnostic support group, fairly local. This only runs for 8 weeks though. Would be greatful for any further advise, coping techiques as a carer.:confused:


Registered User
Aug 24, 2013
Hi Berna
It would help if you gave out a little (not too much) info about your circumstances. Roughly the ages of you and you Dad, are you local to him or miles away, do you work full time, part time and some little bits like that and if your Dad's problem is something you're having to deal with alone or shared. Nothing too personal just so people get a picture of your world and can target advice suited to you, other that the obvious hug, welcome to the site and you are not alone:)


Registered User
Jan 14, 2010
East Kent
Hello Berna
Welcome to TP.
Sorry to hear about your Dad, but glad you have found us, as their is a wealth of info, cyber support and understanding here.

If you havent already done so, join the Alzheimers Association.
Local branches often run Cafes where carers and sufferers can go, may run courses for carers, they will also know what is available in Dads area, help with benefits that dad may be entitled to.

Their are things like, a reduction in council tax that Dad may be entitled to, if not now but certainly later, you or someone else may be entitled to claim Carers Allowance, it not much , a pittance really but it is a help if you qualify for it.

I suggest you seriously consider sorting out LPAs (lasting power of attorney) for Property and finance also health and welfare ASAP,. Hopefully Dad will be agreeable to this as it will make it easier to manage Dads affairs later on.


Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
Hi Berna and welcome to TP. I'm glad you found the forum. You will find lots of help and support here. Lin gives good advice re contacting your local Society etc. they may have some groups your dad might enjoy. It's good that he has you looking out for him. Keep posting. x


Registered User
Nov 3, 2012
Solihull and worcester
Hi Berna

Just reading your blog and Im new to this site too and also struggling with my Mom who has had VD for 4.5years now....its really hard and sometimes I feel Im all alone yet after reading some of the posts Im realise Im not. I hope we both find the support we are looking for Corinne


Registered User
Jan 22, 2013
To both Berna and Corinne,
Welcome to this site. It has been invaluable to me since I joined even if just to know that you are not alone in this journey.
The best bit of advice that was given to me at the beginning of my journey with my mother who is now 89 and has VD is AVOID challenging behaviour. If you find a situation is getting out of hand change direction and try to keep humour in your lives. I battle with my mother to have a shower, I lose on every occasion over the last 4 months or so, as I try she starts to get upset so my compromise and diversion is always to wash her lovely hair.
We have arrived at the no eating stage and although the GP has done a raft of tests there is no real cause other than my mother making the decision not to eat unless she likes what is there. Needless to say I try very hard to make sure she has what she likes.
I wish you both well for this most difficult and sad stage of life.