Our magic bitter sweet moments 🥰🥰🥰

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
25,454
0
Southampton
Thank you all so much for your supportive thoughts, words and prayers. It really does help. This is the place where people have trod these footsteps before us and I have learned from those experiences.

Theres not been much change today. We’re just about to give her some medication for the night. The palliative care team pop in each day to oversee and we’ve seen a lovely chaplain twice too. We’re just being here and hanging out as I did at the nursing home. I continue to care and help where I can. It feels very ordinary in a bizarre way. There’s nothing special to say or do - for me that’s been done in the past few years. I’ve told her we had a blast!

My main break for the day was to spend a couple of hours with my SIL and niece which was lovely. I also had a gander around the nearby church but didn’t stay for the handbell ringers concert….although the lady in the shop said the rehearsal had actually sounded quite orchestra….oh and also been paying all her bills whilst i still have the POA….
you need those breaks. good to be on top of the bills, saves hassle. thinking of you
 

maggie6445

Registered User
Dec 29, 2023
1,754
0
@sdmhred , your strength , resilience, love and care is inspirational. I hope I can be there for my oh like you are for your mum. Thinking of you and your family at this difficult time, with love x
 
Last edited:

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
25,499
0
South coast
Oh @sdmhred , I have just found the news about your mum. I am so so sorry to hear it. This is a very difficult, twilight time and, as you say, you are in limbo

Praying for strength for you and a peaceful passing for your mum
(((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))
 

Rachael03

Registered User
Apr 17, 2023
133
0
@sdmhred this is so very sudden and shocking. Sending love to you, your beautiful mum and your wider family. We are here for you through this.
 

sdmhred

Registered User
Jan 26, 2022
2,654
0
Surrey
I was all ready to write my post for today when at about 8:45pm mum’s breathing started to change. It slowed down and then around 8:55pm we got those long silences between breaths…and then some time between 9 and 9:05pm mum left us to re-join Dad in heaven. It was all quite sudden when we were all prepared for another night camped out at the hospital.

She can now walk again, speak fluently, use both of her hands/arms, know that I am her daughter, make decisions and remember 🥰🥰🥰 Although I would have LOVED to have taken her for more walks in her wheelchair I wouldnt want to deny her those freedoms. We are blessed she went before all quality of life had gone.

It had been a slightly challenging day of struggling with secretions which I have to say wasn’t very pretty. And in choosing to die in the middle of a football match it took over 90mins for her death to be certified. Having always done things outside of the box I helped with her final pad change rather than 2 men she’d never met have that privilege alone.

Tonight I will have the freedom to turn my mobile off for the first time in many months.

Thank you all - it’s so comforting to know you will be hear to uphold me in the coming days and weeks 🥰🥰🥰
 

maggie6445

Registered User
Dec 29, 2023
1,754
0
So sorry to hear this news but sounds like your mum had a peaceful passing. Sending you and your family love x
 

Chizz

Registered User
Jan 10, 2023
4,295
0
Kent
I was all ready to write my post for today when at about 8:45pm mum’s breathing started to change. It slowed down and then around 8:55pm we got those long silences between breaths…and then some time between 9 and 9:05pm mum left us to re-join Dad in heaven. It was all quite sudden when we were all prepared for another night camped out at the hospital.

She can now walk again, speak fluently, use both of her hands/arms, know that I am her daughter, make decisions and remember 🥰🥰🥰 Although I would have LOVED to have taken her for more walks in her wheelchair I wouldnt want to deny her those freedoms. We are blessed she went before all quality of life had gone.

It had been a slightly challenging day of struggling with secretions which I have to say wasn’t very pretty. And in choosing to die in the middle of a football match it took over 90mins for her death to be certified. Having always done things outside of the box I helped with her final pad change rather than 2 men she’d never met have that privilege alone.

Tonight I will have the freedom to turn my mobile off for the first time in many months.

Thank you all - it’s so comforting to know you will be hear to uphold me in the coming days and weeks 🥰🥰🥰
So sorry @sdmhred to read your post. Condolences to you and family.
Your mum is now at peace. You don't have her suffering to worry about anymore.
I know its still a shock even though expected some time, but not so soon.
You did all that you could, and your regular post inspired and helped a lot of other carers.
And you managed to travel back in her log to UK!
Wishing you strength in your grieving process.
A new chapter awaits.
Best wishes
 

Frozen1234

Registered User
Nov 13, 2019
13
0
So sorry to hear about your mum. Losing a dearly loved mum can be very painful and can take time to process. Take care of yourself. Xxx
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
25,454
0
Southampton
I was all ready to write my post for today when at about 8:45pm mum’s breathing started to change. It slowed down and then around 8:55pm we got those long silences between breaths…and then some time between 9 and 9:05pm mum left us to re-join Dad in heaven. It was all quite sudden when we were all prepared for another night camped out at the hospital.

She can now walk again, speak fluently, use both of her hands/arms, know that I am her daughter, make decisions and remember 🥰🥰🥰 Although I would have LOVED to have taken her for more walks in her wheelchair I wouldnt want to deny her those freedoms. We are blessed she went before all quality of life had gone.

It had been a slightly challenging day of struggling with secretions which I have to say wasn’t very pretty. And in choosing to die in the middle of a football match it took over 90mins for her death to be certified. Having always done things outside of the box I helped with her final pad change rather than 2 men she’d never met have that privilege alone.

Tonight I will have the freedom to turn my mobile off for the first time in many months.

Thank you all - it’s so comforting to know you will be hear to uphold me in the coming days and weeks 🥰🥰🥰
so sorry you have lost your mum but now she is free to do whatever she wants. maybe a few more adventures with your dad.
 

Neveradullday!

Registered User
Oct 12, 2022
3,654
0
England
I'm sorry for your loss, @sdmhred - but also relieved for your mum and yourself.
You're right - she is now free of this awful disease. She is sending her love and thanks to you now for being a wonderful daughter. No one could have done better!

To @sdmhred's mum - "Please put in a good word for us up there. Didn't @sdmhred do well!!"
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
75,811
0
73
Dundee
I’ms so sorry for your loss @sdmhred. I’m glad your mum is now at peace and I wish you strength for the days and weeks to come.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
82,688
0
Kent
She can now walk again, speak fluently, use both of her hands/arms, know that I am her daughter, make decisions and remember 🥰🥰🥰

What an amazing attitude @sdmhred. I know you will have the strength to face the coming months.

Please accept my sincere condolences.
 

maisiecat

Registered User
Oct 12, 2023
445
0
I am so sorry to hear your news @sdmhred but what a wonderful daughter you have been to your Mum. You have inspired so many of us with your humour and resilience. The love you have for your Mum has shone through.
Take time for yourself now
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
25,499
0
South coast
I am so sorry for your loss
Im glad that she did not linger, though, and that her passing was peaceful
You are right - she is free from this awful disease now.
Be gentle with yourself now
xxx
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
7,481
0
Nottinghamshire
Sorry to hear your news @sdmhred, but glad your mum is at peace and free of this disease.
As my dear late mother in law used to say look after you now and know that we are always here when you want a chat.