Only 5 days in and I am ashamed to say I am already an exhausted emotional wreck

JaneDee

Registered User
Jul 9, 2012
58
0
Yorkshire
I am currently caring for my mum whilst my dad is away having a break and I cannot believe how exhausted I am already, and I am only half way through my stint. My dad and all who are full time carers deserve a medal!!

After a terrible day yesterday my mum was up and dressed at 3:30 and again at 6. I am unable to go anywhere because as soon as we arrive she wants to leave and repeatedly asks. She also constantly asks for any family member, who is not me! How emotionally wearing, I am currently feeling very isolated (and sorry for myself it seems).

I can see why people start to think about 24 hour care, I worry about how long my dad can cope and how much this is impacting on his health.

Moan over...
 

lin1

Registered User
Jan 14, 2010
9,350
0
East Kent
Sending you a ((((((HUG))))))
you will get through it, promise!!!
It can and does come as a nasty shock when your suddenly dropped into caring 24/7

it could also be mum is worse as she is out of her normal routine, missing your Dad.
 
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worriedson1

Registered User
Jan 30, 2012
1,837
0
Sending you a ((((((HUG))))))
you will get through it, promise!!!
It can and does come as a nasty shock when your suddenly dropped into caring 24/7

it could also be mum is worse as she is out of her normal routine, missing your Dad.

I know the feeling, stay strong, you are doing your very best, take one day at A TIME.

Much love and hugs:)
 

rajahh

Registered User
Aug 29, 2008
2,790
0
Hertfordshire
My step daughter took over the care for my husband ( her father) for 5 nights for me about 3 years ago. She told me she could never do it again.!!

I understand how difficult it is to be thrown in at the deep end so to speak.

When you care for a partner or parent who is widowed then the care grows with you on a daily/monthly basis, But to come in to do respite for your parent as you have is a huge shock .

Well done for offering. Jeannette
 

KentJude

Registered User
Jul 2, 2012
177
0
Maidstone
Hi Jane, yes it often seems that the primary carer is so wrapped up and busy with their relentless tasks and 'fire fighting', that he or she is blinded as to how tough it is and the impact on their physical and mental health.

It's good to hear that although very hard on you with your mum's difficult stage, you've had a chance to see the reality - how much your parents' lives have been changed, and the subsequent strain on your dad.

I hope your father will be open to a talk about the future. He'll know that you'll've seen the full picture by now and could well be relieved if you suggest more outside support. It's probably best to take it slowly for both their sakes though. Sorry if I'm teaching my grandma to suck eggs!

All the best
Jude
 

JaneDee

Registered User
Jul 9, 2012
58
0
Yorkshire
Thanks ever so much for the hugs!! Very much needed and greatly appreciated. The nights are worse but I am now coping better on less sleep. We have a 'bridging the gap' day care lined up at a lovely care home so once ny dad returns hopefully we can get this started.

xx
 

Noorza

Registered User
Jun 8, 2012
6,541
0
I am currently caring for my mum whilst my dad is away having a break and I cannot believe how exhausted I am already, and I am only half way through my stint. My dad and all who are full time carers deserve a medal!!

After a terrible day yesterday my mum was up and dressed at 3:30 and again at 6. I am unable to go anywhere because as soon as we arrive she wants to leave and repeatedly asks. She also constantly asks for any family member, who is not me! How emotionally wearing, I am currently feeling very isolated (and sorry for myself it seems).

I can see why people start to think about 24 hour care, I worry about how long my dad can cope and how much this is impacting on his health.

Moan over...


On the upside imagine how grateful your Dad is to you for this break. He will have a great recharge of his batteries. That's so kind of you.