On the way to the Forum today

[robertjohnmills]

Hi Roger

I was interested in the comments on the LGBT forum and your reason for posting "I knew that some people opposed having a separate LGBT section and so I wanted to know if it really could work."

My opinion is, whilst understanding the concerns and and anxieties of some in having this forum I do believe it serves a useful purpose. Whilst we are all united in common with Dementia, it is the lifestyle effects that are so central to caring and managing it. LGBT people have some very unique issues, some of which may either not be understood or not wished to be understood by those whose age, culture or religion forbid our sexuality. Of course we have much to offer each other but there are some where a minority feel safer confiding or sharing, knowing that readers should expect to be confronted by moral and ethical issues that they may have little or no experience of. I would agree that users are encouraged to use general forums as well. If not the accusation that we (LGBT) individuals are creating our own ghetto by removing ourselves from the mainstream and this is an equitable accusation.

On a personal level I don't think I would have "come out on TP" so readily had there not been a forum. After I developed lots of new Hetero frinds on TP who read the LGBT forum, I then felt comfortable enough and known enough to go more mainstream!

Love and kiss

PS I have decided I will post this on forum as well

 

[chridgets]

Hi Roger & Robert,
Although I am new to TP, I have read a number of the postings re SOGI and having a separate space. Even though I have been out for many years, I was relieved to see that there was a space for us. I too, understand that dementia and many of the ways it plays out are the same regardless of SO or GI. However, the society in which we live and move is not necessarily the same for all of us.

As an educator training workers in the health care field about diversity, i am aware of both the concerns of older LGTB people and the lack of awareness of some staff and possible challenges with residents and family members. We live in such a diverse society and there are so many cultural, religious and/or age differences.

Some of our concerns come out of our history. Those of us who are older have experienced discrimination, hate and even physical violence. Perhaps, another generation won't have the same concerns because they won't have the same lived experience that we have had. I find it particularly offensive when people say ,"It does't matter to me what your sexual orientation is. I treat everyone the same." while I understand what people mean and that they are wanting to reassure us, it is a way of erasing the differences. It does matter to me that I am a lesbian. After many years, I have learned to be proud of who I am and that matters to me. Also, these days the focus is on person centred care which includes sexual orientation.

So I too appreciate having an LGBT section though it doesn't mean I won't read and post in other sections.

Thanks for sharing. Roger, l loved reading your Friends of Dorothy Episodes.

Hi Roger

I was interested in the comments on the LGBT forum and your reason for posting "I knew that some people opposed having a separate LGBT section and so I wanted to know if it really could work."

My opinion is, whilst understanding the concerns and and anxieties of some in having this forum I do believe it serves a useful purpose. Whilst we are all united in common with Dementia, it is the lifestyle effects that are so central to caring and managing it. LGBT people have some very unique issues, some of which may either not be understood or not wished to be understood by those whose age, culture or religion forbid our sexuality. Of course we have much to offer each other but there are some where a minority feel safer confiding or sharing, knowing that readers should expect to be confronted by moral and ethical issues that they may have little or no experience of. I would agree that users are encouraged to use general forums as well. If not the accusation that we (LGBT) individuals are creating our own ghetto by removing ourselves from the mainstream and this is an equitable accusation.

On a personal level I don't think I would have "come out on TP" so readily had there not been a forum. After I developed lots of new Hetero frinds on TP who read the LGBT forum, I then felt comfortable enough and known enough to go more mainstream!

Love and kiss

PS I have decided I will post this on forum as well