Oh what a night!

1mindy

Registered User
Jul 21, 2015
539
Shropshire
My oh went walk about tonight. Actually at about 5.30. I thought he was resting in bed so didn't realise until I went to check on him. Got the search party of family and friends out .Was found about a mile and halfup the main road. Totally unlit,standing a ditch about to go into a field. Got him home safe. Our son came over and oh told him to go into uncertain terms and told me to f off. Then oh wanted to go home ( we are at home).I for the first time ever locked all the doors he then decided to climb out of the window and was shouting for help.We live in an isolated farm.I had phoned the neighbours they came again and got him in. Dr came at about 10 and gavehi.diazapan.It is now11.30 andoh is in bed and still talking about taking his son out ..We move house in 3 weeks.What a mess. Sorry just wanted to see if anyone has any answers. Because I am at the end of my tether.
 

lin1

Registered User
Jan 14, 2010
9,320
East Kent
My oh went walk about tonight. Actually at about 5.30. I thought he was resting in bed so didn't realise until I went to check on him. Got the search party of family and friends out .Was found about a mile and halfup the main road. Totally unlit,standing a ditch about to go into a field. Got him home safe. Our son came over and oh told him to go into uncertain terms and told me to f off. Then oh wanted to go home ( we are at home).I for the first time ever locked all the doors he then decided to climb out of the window and was shouting for help.We live in an isolated farm.I had phoned the neighbours they came again and got him in. Dr came at about 10 and gavehi.diazapan.It is now11.30 andoh is in bed and still talking about taking his son out ..We move house in 3 weeks.What a mess. Sorry just wanted to see if anyone has any answers. Because I am at the end of my tether.
Oh my what an awful worry for you. I am sure others will be along with some helpful advise, I couldn't read n run without replying. I hope the diazepam kicks in soon. apart from locking down as securely as you can I don't think their is much more you can do tonight.
Tomorrow I'd try to get a urine s sample just in case this is being caused by a uti.
 

1mindy

Registered User
Jul 21, 2015
539
Shropshire
The doctor did the uti test and that was OK .Would have been delighted if he had found that to be the cause.Thanks for the thought .
 

Shedrech

Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
8,479
Yorkshire
Hi 1mindy
just wondered if you had any bell like things or anything that when moved will make a noise, and attach it to the bedroom door so you know if he is wandering - a sort of makeshift alarm to wake you
sorry - not much help!
 

jenniferpa

Registered User
Jun 27, 2006
39,448
The doctor did the uti test and that was OK .Would have been delighted if he had found that to be the cause.Thanks for the thought .
Do be aware that the dipstick (I assume) UTI test has false negatives. In fact, they aren't uncommon. If it was a nitrite test, for example, they are wrong 3 out of 4 times on average, particularly when the urine sample isn't a first morning one, which I assume this wasn't. So if things don't improve, don't assume that the test proved anything.
 

1mindy

Registered User
Jul 21, 2015
539
Shropshire
Hi 1mindy
just wondered if you had any bell like things or anything that when moved will make a noise, and attach it to the bedroom door so you know if he is wandering - a sort of makeshift alarm to wake you
sorry - not much help!
This is of some help as it reminded me that ss said they had something that did this which is attached to the bed.I will get onto them today.Thanks
 

Scarlett123

Registered User
Apr 30, 2013
3,802
Essex
Telecare fitted an alarm on my front door that worked like a burglar alarm in reverse - it sounded when John opened the door to get out, and I could over-ride it (he was never aware of this facility ;)), and they offered me other devices.

One of these was a mat, that you could place anywhere (such as by the bed, or bedroom door) that reacted to pressure, and would cause the alarm to sound. It's such a worry for you, and I hope these suggestions might be of some help to you. xxx
 

LadyA

Registered User
Oct 19, 2009
13,558
Ireland
Could you attach something to your OH so he can be found quickly? Something like a GPS tracker thing that you could attach to a set of keys, or a dog collar? I live in the country too, so I know what a worry it is - especially this time of year, when it's dark so early, and the roads are unlit. Thankfully my late husband only went wandering a few times, and never got far - twice, neighbours found him and the last time, I found him down on the main road, which is only about 1/4 mile away (at the time, in the ordinary course of events, he couldn't walk that far!). - as an afterthought, William never had a UTI. Chest infections were his thing. Sometimes so mild he showed no symptoms, but I always knew he was brewing an infection, when he would get a sort of - I can only describe it as a defiant look, a sort of slightly glittery stare - in his eye. That was when you had to watch him for aggressive outbursts etc. When he went to full time care, I described this "look" to the staff, to be on the watch for, and be extra careful. It was a couple of months later the nurse said to me "Oh - now we know what you meant by the "look"!! - and he had an infection.
So, even if there's no UTI, there could be something else brewing. I hope some help can be given - it's awful to watch someone you love so clearly upset and frightened and not be able to help.
 
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1mindy

Registered User
Jul 21, 2015
539
Shropshire
Our daughter took time off work today to come over and spent time looking for day care to give me a break and to give him somethi g of his own.By coincidence the cmht nurse called to see us.Great timing.As we sat chatting oh went out saying he was going to town had the car keys. I said dont worry he can't drive it .Few mins later daughter went out to see where be was, he was just comeing back in she said.Few mins later he hadn't come in. She went out be had vanished. We have a really long drive so he couldn't have got out of sight that quickly. Went out in the cars just to see,daughter found him he was his bike heading home. Never. saw that one coming.Hid the bike now he says our son has stolen it. Oh how it goes on and on .
 

Jinx

Registered User
Mar 13, 2014
2,333
Pontypool
What a nightmare you're having. When my husband was at home with me I had to keep all the doors locked. Like Scarlett I had Telecare alarms fitted just in case he found a key or I'd forgotten to lock the door. He used to get very agitated when he was sundowning and kept trying the doors, I spent many hours out driving him around as it was the only thing that helped.


Sent from my iPad using Talking Point
 

1mindy

Registered User
Jul 21, 2015
539
Shropshire
What a nightmare you're having. When my husband was at home with me I had to keep all the doors locked. Like Scarlett I had Telecare alarms fitted just in case he found a key or I'd forgotten to lock the door. He used to get very agitated when he was sundowning and kept trying the doors, I spent many hours out driving him around as it was the only thing that helped.


Sent from my iPad using Talking Point
Last night was the first night i locked all the doors. He said I wasn't keeping him in.Climbed onto radiator, one leg out of the window shouting help. So that didn't work. Have assessment on new house for aids next week. Sleeping OK so far tonight. Yeh
 
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