Are obsessions a recognised symptom of early dementia? My MIL has obsessions which drive us to distraction. There is usually ‘one on the go’ and when that one has been forgotten / we have refused to comply with / we have done what is asked, it disappears to be very shortly replaced by another. There are other concerns about her behaviour - she writes EVERYTHING down and has so many lists / bits of paper that she sometimes can’t find the necessary bits of paper. She has no concept of the bigger picture re money. She can cope with what’s in her purse but can’t grasp how much money she actually has in total. She has her name down for a residential care home - she’s almost 90 and this is her choice- but she’s terrified her money will run out. We have carefully explained that she could live to over 100 and still have money, but she just can’t grasp that concept. Her short term memory is poor - hence the writing everything down. She is also very egocentric. Could these all be attributed to ‘old age’ or from your experience are we facing another parent with dementia? We have already had 2 with dementia. Your thoughts would be much appreciated.
Obsessions
- Thread starter annierich
- Start date
I certainly recognise the procession of short-lived obsessions. As soon as you get rid of one another one replaces it 
The constant bits of paper and lists. lists and more lists, the lost of understanding of money and even the loss of empathy are all symptoms of dementia.
However, there can be other reasons for this - low vitB12, thyroid problems and depression (and some other things that I cant remember) can all mimic dementia, so see if you can get your MIL to go to the GP for blood tests etc. If all the tests are negative she might be referred to the memory clinic.
The constant bits of paper and lists. lists and more lists, the lost of understanding of money and even the loss of empathy are all symptoms of dementia.
However, there can be other reasons for this - low vitB12, thyroid problems and depression (and some other things that I cant remember) can all mimic dementia, so see if you can get your MIL to go to the GP for blood tests etc. If all the tests are negative she might be referred to the memory clinic.
Yes, obsessions can be part of dementia. No, what you describe does not sound like normal aging.
However, there can be other reasons for memory problems, and conditions they look like dementia, including, but not limited to, vitamin deficiency, thyroid problems, medication problems, and so on. Even an infection can cause confusion in a person without dementia. I would share your concerns with the GP and get her thoroughly checked out. Best wishes.
However, there can be other reasons for memory problems, and conditions they look like dementia, including, but not limited to, vitamin deficiency, thyroid problems, medication problems, and so on. Even an infection can cause confusion in a person without dementia. I would share your concerns with the GP and get her thoroughly checked out. Best wishes.
Hello @annierich, I see everything you describe in my wife, who is early onset Alzheimer's. Indeed, much of what you state set in a few years before diagnosis in 2017.
Yes saw what you describe in dad although as he declined they lessened to be replaced by other challenges. A GP visit will hopefully pin point whether it is likely to be this or another cause
My husband has gone from one obsession to the next. Sometimes he gives up an obsession for months or even years then goes back to it. The trick is to find out what the trigger is and avoid it like the plague eg I would never produce family albums or we would be back on the obsession with dead brothers and meeting them for a pint! He was obsessed with a cinema which was knocked down in 1960 and that is currently on the back burner.
Everything you've written could have been written about my own mum - the endless proliferation of lists, the money worries (inc. the inability to grasp the big picture) and the increasing loss of ability to focus on other people. My mum is 92 and was diagnosed with early stage Alzheimer's about a year ago, but I reckon that it had been coming on gradually for years - we just didn't know that's what it was.
I really struggle to deal patiently with the obsessions, but I am trying to accept that there is no point in trying to be rational about them - they are pressing concerns to her (until something else rises to the top of the list) and trying to talk her out of them just causes us both stress. Often much easier said than done, however!!
I think the writing everything down thing is a desperate attempt to keep control. It must be so, so horrid to feel you are losing your ability to organise your head and life.
For your sake (and your MIL's!) I sincerely hope that it's not dementia - nobody deserves to go through it with their loved ones just once, never mind three times... Hope the GP gets to the bottom of it and doesn't fob you off like they tried to do with us.
I really struggle to deal patiently with the obsessions, but I am trying to accept that there is no point in trying to be rational about them - they are pressing concerns to her (until something else rises to the top of the list) and trying to talk her out of them just causes us both stress. Often much easier said than done, however!!
I think the writing everything down thing is a desperate attempt to keep control. It must be so, so horrid to feel you are losing your ability to organise your head and life.
For your sake (and your MIL's!) I sincerely hope that it's not dementia - nobody deserves to go through it with their loved ones just once, never mind three times... Hope the GP gets to the bottom of it and doesn't fob you off like they tried to do with us.
Thanks for all your comments. Sadly I feel that we are going down the dementia route again. 3 out of 4 parents. We are coping with her at the moment and I suspect the diagnosis will be vascular dementia as she has had a couple of TIAs. So medication will be out. She had a partial thyroidectomy many years ago so her thyroid levels are closely monitored. I think, barring any crisis, we will wait until she gets a place in the care home. As I am the DIL who gets the sarcastic comments / anger directed at, I am loathe to suggest a GP appointment. I think it needs to come from one of her sons. The memory of their father’s journey through dementia, he only died 9 months ago, is still very raw. I don’t think they want to admit to having another parent with dementia. MIL is safe at the moment - that’s the main priority.
Oh don’t worry that was done long ago. My BIL already ‘helps’ her with her money / bank account. One of our previous worries was her hoarding of paracetamols. We removed over 300 from her house once - she had hidden them everywhere. I’m surprised she doesn’t have food poisoning on a regular basis - we once tried Wiltshire Foods - never to be repeated. She thawed it out (on the floor in front of a radiator) then cooked it in the oven. The instructions clearly stated ‘cook from frozen in microwave’. Sigh!
Oh bless her & both of you it must be such a worry for you. I do hope you can get some tests done very soon & put things in place to help you all.
Update. My MIL has been offered an assisted living apartment in the local care home. Hopefully she will move in next week. Her latest jaw dropper was on Mother’s Day when she told my daughter and SIL who were visiting her, that she didn’t want to go out for a walk in the sunshine as ‘what would her neighbours think if they saw her on her own on Mother’s Day’? We had taken her out for a meal on Saturday night and my BIL and SIL spent 1.5 hrs with her on Mother’s Day morning. Her logic and self obsession are becoming worse.
Logic and empathy with others are often two early casualties with dementia. Once that has started it is best if you protect your own feelings by never expecting any return to normal in those areas and remembering that it's the disease talking. A sad reality with this cruel disease.
KaraokePete. Thanks. Protecting my own feelings is hard and yesterday my stress levels were sky high. My poor Slimming World consultant got my emotions full time when I was explaining why I had gained weight! Luckily she’s a friend and understands. Stress levels have returned to normal today.
There are some vids on YouTube by an American lady called Teepa Snow and they are well worth a watch. In one she relates how just stepping back to take a few deep breaths helps with reducing the stress levels - I try to follow that advice every time I remember it.
Update 2. Friday can’t come soon enough. She has signed all the paper work so is now spending an eye watering amount every week for the CH. She has managed to get one of the assisted living flats, against my better judgement but she’s not my mum, and is now causing no end of chaos while she decides when she wants to ‘go in’ and what she will be taking with her. Initially she said she wanted to go in next Monday - so that would be a week of wasted money paying for an empty flat, but her sons have now told her she is going in on Friday. She said that she wouldn’t be packed and ready by Friday. My husband told her that she wouldn’t be ready no matter which day was moving day. Then she said that she didn’t want her sons to pack her underwear ( like they have never seen a woman’s underwear before!) and she didn’t want her drugs in a suitcase ‘because she wouldn’t be able to see what was in the case???? I do hope that the staff have an endless supply of patience because ours is running very thin.
My Mums obsession is paper! She has literally hundreds of paper tissues in her bag, along with coarse paper hand towels and soft stoma wipes. She gets muddled up with their various uses too. She constantly says that she is right out of them as people keep taking them, which of course isnt true. She seems to get some comfort from just hoarding them.
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